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"I'm well aware that being dead and buried has weakened my position in the corporation."
Tags:dead, status, status update, status updates, coffin, coffins, funeral, funerals, corporation, corporations, corporate mentality, corporate mentalities, weakened position, weakened positions, demotion, demote, demotes, demoted, demotions, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, executive, executives, dark humor, dark humour
"I'm looking to hire someone who can be acquiescent without making me uncomfortably aware of it."
Tags:underling, underlings, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, acquiesce, acquiescing, subservient, subservience, attitude, attitudes, boss, bosses, manager, managers, corporate culture, power trip, power trips, new hire, new hires, ideal employee, ideal employees, interview, interviews, job interview, job interviews, honest, honesty, self-aware, self-awareness
Climbing to the top.
"The water for your fishbowl was approved, but it looks like for now you're not getting the fish."
Tags:approval, request, requests, office, hierarchy, hierarchies, corporation, corporations, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, bureaucracy, bureaucracies, faceless bureaucracy, faceless bureaucracies, office drone, office drones, office worker, office workers, process, processes, approval process, approval processes, pend, pends, pending, wait, waits, waiting, regulation, regulations, rule, rules, health and safety
"I see myself rising through the ranks of the organization until midlife, when I will most likely hit a wall and go screaming through the door."
Tags:midlife, midlife crisis, midlife crises, peter principle, ceiling, ceilings, competent, competence, incompetent, incompetence, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate culture, corporation, corporations, megacorporation, megacorporations, white collar job, white collar jobs, office drone, office drones
'We reorganized so many times we are now one of our own subsidiaries.'
"And you can rest assured that your problem is being ignored at the very highest levels."
Tags:men, problems, office, hierarchy, ignore, ignores, ignoring, ignored, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate culture, underling, underlings, office drone, office drones, corporate drone, corporate drones, ceo, ceos, executive, executives, office executive, office executives, mankoff
"We only hire temps, and you have a look of permanence about you."
Tags:temp, temps, temp worker, temp workers, office temp, office temps, permanent, permanence, permanent job, permanent jobs, worker, workers, workplace, workplaces, corporation, corporations, corporate culture, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, big corporation, big corporations, uncaring, hire, hires, hiring
Tags:corporate ladder, the corporate ladder, career, careers, career progression, corporate ladders, climbing the ladder, glass ceiling, glass ceilings, class divide, class divides, social climbing, its not what you know, impossible task, impossible tasks, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, ladder, ladders, rung, rungs, ambition, ambitious, aspiring, aspiration, aspirations, privilege, privileged, privileges
"Good news, Connors. I'm elevating you to crony."
A Thinking Man's Guide to the Tuxedo T-Shirt
Tags:tuxedo, tuxedos, tuxedo shirt, tuxedo shirt, t-shirt, t-shirts, tuxedo t-shirt, tuxedo t-shirts, tacky, tackiness, fashion faux pas, faux pas, fashion don't, outfit, outfits, unprofessional, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, instructions, guide, guides, fashionista, fashionistas, ironic, hipster, hipsters, dress up, dresses up, dressing up, classy, classless
"Ah, Mr. Conrad, you're right on time."
"I made partner!"
Tags:solicitor, solicitors, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, barrister, barristers, counsel, counselor, legal counsel, promotion, promotions, corporate hierarchies, office hierarchies, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, climbing the ladder, cowboy, cowboys, word play, coming home, home coming, breadwinner, breadwinners, bread winner, bread winners, partner, partners, partnership, partnerships
The Executive's Cafe.
"You fed me tuna and cleaned my litter box, Harris, and I'm not going to forget it."
Tags:tuna, tunafish, ceo, ceos, c.e.o., c.e.o.s, chief executive, chief executives, promotion, promotions, promoted, colleague, colleagues, new boss, new bosses, favor, favors, reward, rewards, rewarding, favour, favours, hierarchy, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, cat person, cat people, cat, cats, favorite food, favorite foods, favourite food, favourite foods, manager, managers, management, newly promoted, litter box, litter boxes, corporation, corporations
"Now, that's the kind of innovative thinking I'd like to see around our shop."
Tags:stockbroker, stockbrokers, broker, brokers, suicide, suicides, suicidal, market crash, market crashes, crash, crashes, stock market, stock markets, investor, investors, innovate, innovates, innovating, innovator, innovators, innovation, innovations, office worker, office workers, bear market, bear markets, executive, executives, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, approval, boss, bosses, manager, managers, upper management
"Why no raise? Because, Fellman, we've been ?scally feckless."
Tags:raise, raises, pay raise, pay raises, pay rise, pay rises, fiscal, fiscal responsibility, fiscally responsible, feckless, irresponsible, irresponsibility, executive, executives, manager, managers, management, money manager, money managers, accountant, accountants, accounting department, accounting departments, office, offices, priority, priorities, selfish, self-interested, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies, hierarchy, hierarchies
'Great job at today's meeting, Dunwoody. You're finally discovering your own voice as a yes-man!'
'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'
'You'll learn that our corporate structure is a bit unconventional.'
"Meechum, clear out your desk and be out of this building in an hour."
Tags:yes man, yes men, fired, firing, firings, layoff, layoffs, laid off, laying off, subservient, subservience, boss, bosses, manager, managers, management, can do, comply, complies, complying, compliant, office drone, office drones, worker drone, worker drones, executive, executives, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, last day, last days, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies
"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, son, sons, dad, dads, father, fathers, corporate, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, following in fathers footsteps, boss, bosses, business, businesses, businessmen, businessman, office, offices, executive, executives, intern, interns, internship, internships, cardboard cutout, cardboard cutouts
'Well, SURE they'd like me to come up with bold and innovative ideas...but I've got a career to protect!'
"I'm sorry, Ms. Farkas can't see you right now. Can you come back when you're more important?"
"Remember when the old guys were on top and the young guys were on the bottom?"
Tags:age, ages, aging, ageing, grow old, grows old, growing old, outdated, outmoded, last year's model, young, young guy, young guys, usurp, usurps, usurping, work, work life, modern life, modern times, corporate culture, corporate hierarchy, hierarchy, hierarchies, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, old-fashioned, out-of-date, middle age, middle aged, hotshot, hotshots, young hotshot, young hotshots, office worker, office workers, office drone, office drones