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"O.K., there's the moon - now give me a nice long howl instead of last night's yip."
Succumbing to pressure from players and fans, the home plate umpire agrees to undergo on-the-spot Lasik eye surgery.
"Don't take offense, Zack, but it's 'Indians', not Injuns, and 'nuclear' not 'nuculer'"
'Do you run everything through a spell-checker?'
'It's your mother. You're being recalled for the correction of a minor defect.'
'Way to screw up again, pencil. Well here I come to save the day.'
One way only.
Tags:one way sign, one way signs, reprimand, reprimands, reprimanding, correct, corrects, correction, corrections, bad behavior, retaliate, retaliates, retaliating, transgression, transgressions, transgress, transgressing, lawbreaker, lawbreakers, rule, rules, rule breaker, rule breakers, break rules, breaking rules, criminal, criminals, criminality, right of way, rights of way
'Whoa! Time out. The loud guy in the white shirt is right - that was a ball. My mistake. Sorry everyone. Thank you, sir.'
"Can you do something to correct this horrible face doctor?"
'No, I'm not a housewife. Are you a househusband?'
'I'm not a 'chick'. Are you a rooster?'
"I'm against capital punishment."
Tags:baldo, political issue, political issues, capital punishment, capital letter, capital letters, grammar error, grammar errors, grammar mistake, grammar mistakes, proofread, proofreads, proofreading, proofreader, proofreaders, proof read, proof reads, correct, corrects, correction, corrections, homework, tutor, tutors, tutoring
"Being smart is great! I wish I was smarter! But I would never want to be a smart Alex. That would be annoying."
Tags:baldo, smart aleck, smart alecks, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, mishear, mishears, mishearing, misheard, know-it-all, know-it-alls, annoying, irritating, frustrating, pedant, pedants, pedantry, pedantic, correction, corrections, correct, corrects, rude, rudeness, cool, coolness, isolate, isolates, isolating, isolation, social outcast, social outcasts
'Probably just another correctional movement...'
'No, he isn't the original Napster.'
"We will indeed be facing numerous enraged customers."
Tags:baldo, circular, circulars, printout, printouts, advertising, advertisement, advertisements, handbill, handbills, error, errors, printing error, printing errors, printout, printouts, flyer, flyers, enrage, enraged, enraging, enrages, disgruntled, misleading, misled, manager, managers, incompetent, incompetence, correct, corrects, correcting, correction, corrections, closed, close up, closing up
'No, no briefcase... FLATSCREEN.'
"I've spent most of my life in a correctional facility."
'Correct me if I'm wrong.' (Everyone holds their hand up).
'I could look like that too, if I didn't have to spend all my time correcting your faults.'