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'I'm afraid the Christmas party has been cancelled on cost grounds...but the good news is that the boss has said you can still come in and photocopy your bottoms!'
Manufacturing will take place in China...So what role does Europe have?...you borrow money to be the customer
'We need your views on cost-benefit and risk-benefit.'
'I couldn't afford a spray tan, so I did it myself with a brush and roller.'
'The risk-benefit analysis says no, the cost-benefit analysis says maybe, and the gut feeling says 'Go for it'!'
Thrift: Get as much amputated as possible.
"We considered a number of alternatives but this was the cheapest."
Thrift: bathe fully dressed and wash your clothes at the same time
"We've managed to outsource training to a company that will say 'yes sir,no sir' for 20% less."
Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.
'I wish that just once the contract would go to someone besides the lowest bidder.'
'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'
'I'm sorry, Rudolph, you reindeers are too expensive. This year, I'll work with subcontractors.'
'Generally, cost-cutting is a good thing. Specifically, too much of a good thing.'
'And exactly how much less did it cost to implement Five Sigma instead of Six, Dwayne?'
Desk trays - 'In' and 'Out-sourced'.
"So how are the cut-backs affecting your department?"
"One day this will all be outsourced."
"We're letting you go, delivering by drone is cheaper."
Tags:christmas, christmases, xmas, xmases, elf, elves, santa, santa claus, father christmas, saint nick, saint nicholas, st. nick, st. nicholas, delivery drone, delivery drones, uav, uavs, drone, drones, delivery, deliveries, courier, couriers, lay off, lay offs, redundancy, redundancies, cost cutting, economizing, economising, downsizing, downsized, downsize
"Something is definitely going on. We're back to eating dog food."
Tags:economize, economising, economizing, economise, dog food, dog foods, gourmet, gourmet food, gourmet foods, gourmand, gourmands, dog, dogs, canine, canines, pet, pets, downsizing, cutting cost, cutting costs, cost cutting, spending habits, spending cuts, spending habit, family pet, family pets, money troubles, money problems
"He's worried that the changes might only affect 10% of the job, but it might be the 10% he knows something about!"
Tags:cuts, cutbacks, manager, management, skills, skill, change, change management, restructure, restructures, restructuring, cutting, cost cutting, cost saving, cost savings, cutting overhead, cutting overheads, business change, business changes, incompetent, incompetent worker, incompetent workers, incompetent employee, incompetent employees, middle manager, middle managers, middle management
We've cut out a lot of unnecessary middle management, or at least I think we have... There's no one left in HR to do a headcount!"
Tags:cuts, cutbacks, cut, cutting, cost cutting, cost cutting measure, cost cutting measures, human resources department, useless, middle management, middle manager, middle managers, hr, human resources, personnel, personnel department, personnel departments, manager, management, headcount, statistics, cutback, cutbacks, downsize, downsizes, downsizing
'And you thought buying a used car from a taxi company was a good idea!'
'They called it 'outsourcing'.'
STRIP *Community Care * "No, that really is your budget."