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"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."
Tags:art, artist, artists, artwork, artworks, painter, painters, painting, paintings, famous painting, famous paintings, copy, copies, forger, forgers, forging, counterfeit, counterfeiter, counterfeiters, fake, fakes, fraud, white-collar crime, criminal, criminals, national gallery, master, masters, museum, museums, gallery, galleries, collection, collector, collectors, art appraiser, art appraisers, news, good news, credit, taking credit, modern life
"I'd like the Court to remember that my client only got into counterfeiting to counteract what he felt was an overly restrictive monetary policy on the part of the Fed."
Tags:court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, legal system, justice system, law, laws, legal, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, defence, defense, defendant, defendants, client, clients, reminder, reminders, reminding, counterfeiting, counterfeiter, counterfeiters, money, counterfeit money, monetary policy, fiscal policy, economics, economy, restrictive, strict, limiting, government, governments, politics, fed, feds, federal government, federal governments, excuse, excuses, blame, blaming, blame game
I made my money the old fashioned way... I printed it.
All my fake IDs and forged documents were stolen. Please help.
'Aw, it didn't fool you? I spent all day smooshing baked beans to look like coins.'
'You spent all day mashing a can of a hundred baked beans and drawing a little man on them to look like pennies?'
"You gotta make money to spend money when you're in the counterfeiting business."
"I was making big money! Yes, an inch too big."
'It's not fair. The Fed pays people good salaries for doing the same thing.'
Double your salary - Xerox your paycheck.
Antiques made daily!!
'I've figured it out. To make money today you need to be a CEO or a counterfeiter.'
'My first counterfeit dollar.'
'Still up to your old tricks, eh, Lefty? You're in here for counterfeiting and now you're faxing $20 bills to a cohort on the outside.'
'Well you checked my £20 note so I'm checking the change you gave me!'
'It's a letter from my cousin. He made a lot of money with photocopiers and will be out of jail in about five years.'
'Let's face it,George-your pound notes are fooling nobody!'
'Ring the Sarge, Mary, and tell him that we've booked the counterfeiting gang and I'm just taking a few notes!'
For some reason, Carl Jones was to fail in his career as an international counterfeiter.
'So I said, if you think this money is counterfeit, prove it.'
"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."
"Oh, no, John!! When you said the new graphics card would make us money..."
"It's not fair. I get 10 years for counterfeiting and people making fortunes with cryptocurrency."