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"'Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble..."
Extreme Court Reporting
'Early Court Reporting.' 'Could you slow down, already?'
'Steno Keypads 50% OFF' 'So, would you like the model that only types verbs, or the one that only types nouns?'
'Have you considered going wireless?'
'Why, first thing on Monday mornings, do I always get someone who can't enunciate very well?'
"The court reporter will strike that last 'uuuhhhhhh!'"
'I firmly believe in the right to a speedy trial.'
'I don't think this court reporting machine is user friendly.'
"Disorder in the Court!"
'Okay, now read that back to me in your best James Earl Jones voice.'
'Read the suspect's statement back to me.' 'Aayagh! Stop it! Aayagh! All right! I confess.'
'Congratulations. It's an eight pound court reporter.'
'He's a Court Reporting Machine Whisperer.'
A popular tattoo for court reporters.
'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'
'Just show me where to kick it.'
'Hell for Court Reporters.' 'All the witnesses here either speak 500 words per minutes or are mimes.'
Court Reporter Machines Just Reduced for Quick Sale.
'What luck! A court reporter.'
'I can take 400 words per minute.'
'... the party of the first part is to give the party of the second part ...'
'I hate it when court's out in recess.'
The red tape on this case was monumental.
Writing Naked is how many court reporters describe writing in realtime with others watching.