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'Do you have a backup plan?'
National Pigeon Monument (poos on someone's head).
"I'd invite you in, but my crap is all over the place."
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'C'mon square root of 49!'
'Our new client wants to invest in high risk stocks, book my usual seat at the craps table.'
'Oops This is doggie heaven,'
'We've finally developed a hybrid slot machine-roulette wheel-sports book.'
'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'
'Could someone just tell me if I win anything?'
'We have slots in the lobby, blackjack at the pool and keno in the cafe - however, I'm afraid we don't allow craps in the restrooms.'
'I was groped, rolled and cursed at by a bunch of losers. How was your day?'
'This town was built from the losses of thousands of suckers, Billy. Fortunately for us, we know what we're doing.'
'A year ago my wife thought she'd found the perfect parking space--$80,000 in quarters later, she's still trying to leave.'
'I bet the farm at roulette and won. What am I going to do now with 37 farms?'
'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'
'Sorry, this machine only takes small bills.'
'We should've stuck with poker.'
'My wife encourages this. She thinks I'm playing the Russian version.'
'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'
'I came for the $1.99 seafood buffet--I'm staying for the restrooms.'
'I actually lose money on the drink, but I pulled in six figures last year from that thing.'
'Something about this doesn't seem right--we found the king, face down, in the river.'
Dice with death.