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"It's pro-active, Stan. I'm leaving you before you become a midlife male sleazeball creep."
"It's courtesy of the gentleman seated at the other end of the bar, ma'am."
The Las Vegas Oddsmakers
Tags:steal, stealing, stealing base, base, stealing the base, las vegas, vegas, baseball, baseball game, expansion team, expansion teams, sports, competitive sports, america, american, region, regions, regional, gambling, gambler, gamblers, casino, casinos, sleaze, sleazy, sleazeball, creep, creeps, scam, scamming, scammer, scammed, scams, con, con artist, conned, cons, play on words, word play, word-play, fix, fixed, fixed game
"Need a hand with that Chekhov, pretty lady?"
Tags:bookworm, book worm, bookworms, book worm, book, books, novel, novels, library, librarians, librarian, book lover, book lovers, literature, literary, lit, lit major, read, reading, avid reader, readers, reader, novel, novels, novelist, novelists, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, modern life, modern world, flirt, creepy, creep, creeps, chekhov, misogyny, misogynist
"That was my answering cervix."
"My love for you is bigger than that, Melanie, which is why I'm able to ignore the restraining order."
"It belonged to my great great great. . . . creepy Uncle Edgar."
Tags:ancestor, ancestors, ancestry, headhunter, headhunters, head-hunter, head-hunters, headhunting, head-hunting, creep, creeps, hunting trophy, hunting trophies, heirloom, heirlooms, family heirloom, family heirlooms, inheritance, spear hunting, spear hunter, relative, relatives, great uncle, great uncles, family history
1,001 Cheap Disguises
Tags:disguise, disguised, disguises, book, books, bad disguise, bad disguises, weirdo, weird, how-to, costume, costumes, fancy dress, park, parks, creep, creeps, creepy, hide, hidden, hiding, conceal, concealed, mask, camo, camouflage, masks, impersonate, impersonator, impersonators, impostor, impostors
"How much are we supposed to tip the guy who followed us to our room and flicked the light switch?"
Tags:tip, tipping, tipped, tipping culture, attendant, unnecessary, work, gratuity, service charge, unwanted, awkward, excessive, excessively, unneeded, redundant, creepy, desperate, desperately, eager, overly eager, gratuities, creep, creeps, bellhop, bellhops, bellboy, bellboys, bell hop, bell hops, bell boy, bell boys, service charge, service charges, uncertainty, social expectation, social expectations, social graces
"Is there a better number I can stalk you on?"
A fairy godmother grants an old man a wish.
"You keep forgetting those are regular glasses, not your sunglasses."
Tags:gender issue, gender issues, gender inequality, sexist, sexists, misogyny, misogynist, misogynists, unwanted attention, unwanted male attention, ogle, ogling, stare, staring, sunglasses, bikini, bikinis, sunbathing, sunbathers, disguise, disguises, caught red handed, sneak, sneaky, creep, creeps, creepy
"I don't care if he is one of the few dissenting voices around. Make him stop whispering in my ear!"
"I don't know, just call it women's intuition."
Tags:snake, snakes, animal, animals, bad guy, bad guys, creep, creeps, bad feeling, bad feelings, uncomfortable, intuition, women's intuition, gut feeling, gut feelings, alcohol, booze, bar, bars, pub, pubs, beer, beers, cocktail, cocktails, drink, drinks, drinker, drinkers, drinking, drunk, drunks, bartender, bartenders
"It's the kind of trade you get in a twenty-four-hour-a-day joint."
"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."
Tags:anthony, anthony hopkins, actor, actors, films, film, movie, movies, creepy, creep, creeps, urban, urban living, urban life, reference, references, bus, buses, public transport, car, cars, travel, transport, public, commute, commuting, commuter, commuters, commutes, actor, actors, acting, hannibal, scared, scary, terror, terrified, paranoid, paranoia, long day, long day at work, modern life, modern, city, city life, city living, married, couple, couples, married life, pop culture, pop cultures, culture, cinema, hollywood
A Valentine for Ivanka
"I'm very proud. Someone I've been stalking has been nominated for an Academy Award."
Jim Receives A Note Under The Door And Is Intrigued, Especially Because It's The Closet Door
"Don't worry - I'm on the pill."
By April, the Great Pervert Airlift was in full swing...
"...and for you, Dorothy, that I.U.D. you've been wanting."
"He gives me the creeps. I Think it's love."