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'These next few questions may make you a little uncomfortable. I hope they do. You look way too comfortable.'
"Oh, Herb. Not Another Open Letter To Miley Cyrus."
"Everybody's a critic!"
"The witness is being evasive, your honor. He answers every single question with 'I don't know. I was asleep at the time'!"
"Doesn't anyone ever say 'please' anymore?"
"Of course, I'd love to, Geoff. If only that chair weren't so flimsy."
"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"
Cross-examination has come a long way.
'Do you honestly expect us to believe you're just the fall guy?'
'You say you saw my client do it. OK, but what if the jury doesn't believe you? Try to think outside the witness box.'
'Keep your answers short. Long sentences lead to longer sentences.'
'Forget you're a lawyer, Fred. You're cross examining me again.'
"No, I can't explain it – but I brought a prop that might help."