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"I love you. We all love you. Now throw some strikes."
'All I know is that when life hands you a lemon, you're supposed to make lemonade...is there such a thing as curveballade?'
"Ok, one finger means fastball, two fingers means curve, three fingers means changeup...and quite often I'll flash you the middle finger, because I've always hated your guts!"
'If I rub my chin, it's a fastball. If I rub my cheek, it's a curve ball. If I rub my eyes, it's hay fever.'
"I sense a certain ambivalent bounce in your pitches...and it makes me feel vulnerable."
'Well if that's the case, I'll throw him mostly curves.'
'He ain't never gonna read this one.'
"Should I practice my violin or my curve ball?"
'Listen,kid, you're going to have to lower your standards if you ever want to throw the sleazeball.'
'Uniformaly accelerated motion...'
'So much for the question of whether of whether or not a curveball really curves.'
"Your fastball is just hanging and your curve isn't breaking at all. What you should do is take an analgesic with some pain-relieving anti-inflammatory ingredients for a few days."