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"Your father cut quite a figure jumping the fence into our yard that moonlit night. I never saw him again."
"Hello, this is Johnny Deadbeat. I'm not home right now but my check is in the mail."
"I need to leave you and the children and go to Tahiti if I'm ever going to be a truly great accountant."
"On the other hand, Timmy. Fear of failure has kept daddy from ever being seriously injured."
"I can't believe you're bringing up my past due bill just as I've begun to accept myself as a deadbeat."
"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."
"He takes after his deadbeat dad."
"One day your father said he was going for a swim and that was the last I ever saw of him."
"Right now I'm a stay-at-home dad, but when this baby comes I'm going back to work."
"Deny it all you want. He looks just like you."
'We've decided to go with your idea of putting deadbeat dads on milk cartons.'
"...And that was Lyndon Johnson's basis for a 'Great Society'."
"I didn't want him growing up to be like his father."