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Cheese of the Week: Brie
Tags:brie, cheese, gourmet, cheese lover, foodie, foodies, food lover, food lovers, delivery, deliver, delivered, delivers, mail, mailman, mail order, mail orders, post, postal, posted, postal order, post order, slot, through the slot, through the door, melted cheese, grilled cheese, grill, melt, melting, grills, mess, messes, messy
Gas truck that has run out of gas.
Tags:gas, gasoline, petrol, diesel, fuel, fuels, kerosine, benzine, truck, trucks, trucking, trucker, truckers, delivery, deliver, deliveries, delivered, delivering, ran out, run out, broken down, break down, break downs, breaking down, roadside, road, roads, vehicle, vehicles, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"Tag! Your salary's frozen."
'55 minutes? Really? And you call yourself the fastest land mammal?'
It's not the destination, but the journey that counts. Until you screw up. Then it's all about the destination.
'I wasn't in a bar!! I smell like smoke because I've been going down chimneys all flippin' night!'
Tags:santa, santa claus, christmas, christmases, christmasy, december 25th, december, christmas eve, bar, bars, drink, drinks, drinking, drunk, deliver, delivery, delivers, delivered, chimney, chimneys, smoke, smokey, smokes, smoking, accused, accusing, wife, work, working, job, jobs, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'This is going to be a long night.'
Tags:santa, santa claus, reindeer, reindeers, sleigh, december 25th, christmas day, christmas eve, presents, present, gift, gifts, deliver, delivery, delivers, delivered, fly, flies, flied, flying, fall, fallen, fell, falls, trip, tripped, trips, long night, clumsy, christmas lights, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Waiting for Pants
"Dear USPS - Julie Michael's mail is no longer in care of Apt. 8-B. She has moved out to Queens. Queens!! Can you believe it??? Three years I devoted to that woman! Oh, well. C'est la vie. I'll find someone else I suppose. Eventually. Yeah, right!"
Tags:forward mail, forwards mail, forwarding mail, neighbor, neighbors, neighbour, neighbours, mailbox, mailboxes, breakup, breakups, break-up, break-ups, breakup, breakups, breaking up, split up, splits up, splitting up, heartbreak, heartbreaking, heartbroken, love, loves, post, posts, postbox, postboxes, delivery, deliveries, deliver, delivers, delivering
18 Teller Avenue
Tags:mail, post, snail mail, postwoman, postman, postperson, mailwoman, mailman, mailperson, postie, postal carrier, deliver, delivery, email, email filters, spam folder, spam folders, mail folders, primary, social, promo, mail filters, filters, technology, old tech, modern life, modern, modern communication, milennial, millennials
'You didn't bring any war toys did you?'
Santa delivering newspapers
"Who ordered the krill pizza?"
Tags:whale, whales, rescue, rescuer, rescuers, rescued, rescue team, sealife, marine life, whaling, beluga, humpback, humpback whale, beached, beaches, beach, beached whale, fish, seashore, pizza, delivery, pizza boy, pizza guy, pizza man, deliver, delivered, pizzas, pizza delivery, krill, krills, order, order in, take away, takeaway, takeout, take out, animal, animals, modern, modern life, modern world
'I'm tired of hunting and gathering... doesn't anyone deliver?'
"Flight 570 reports its starboard engines sucked in Dasher and Dancer and the port intakes just got Donner and Blitzen!"
Tags:flight control, flight controls, flight controller, air traffic, air traffic control, air traffic controls, santa, santa claus, sleigh, sleighs, deliver, delivers, delivering, present, presents, gift, gifts, airline, airlines, airliner, airliners, airplane, airplanes, jet engine, jet engines, sucked into a jet engine, jet intake, reindeer, delivery, deliveries, christmas, christmas season, holiday season, die, dies, dying, death, deaths, christmas eve
"Ha! Hey, Ralph, this says it's to go to Sea-Park, but it's the wrong address. Weird, huh? Ralph!"
The take-out drone
"Delivery in thirty minutes or your pizza is free(zing)."
Tags:deliver, delivers, delivery, pizza, pizzas, cold pizza, cold pizzas, terms and conditions, fine print, offer, offers, deal, deals, shifty, dealing, dealings, guarantee, guarantees, ad, ads, advert, adverts, advertisement, advertisements, technicality, technicalities, asterisk, asterisks, advertising, mislead, misled, misleading
"I would like the 12 inch pizza with extra anchovies and mozzarella. Can you deliver?"
"Complimentary crystal ball to see when the BLT you ordered might be showing up."
Tags:fortune teller, fortune tellers, crystal ball, crystal balls, room service, room services, hotel, hotels, customer service, bad service, deliver, delivery, sandwich, sandwiches, blt, blts, slow service, order, ordering, orders, damage limitation, placate, placating, placated, update, updates, updating
"How cute! A smiley face on my pink slip."
Tags:smiley, smileys, smile, smiles, smiley face, smiley faces, pink slip, pink slips, fire, fired, fires, sack, sacks, sacking, sackings, firings, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, corporate culture, bad news, deliver, delivers, delivering, delivery, deliveries, notice, notices, notification, notifications, optimist, optimists, glass half full
They didn't tell me what to do with it. I thought they told you what to do with it.
'I don't think I could have picked a tougher line of work.'
"Don't look at me like that. Advertising pays the bills."
Tags:christmas, santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, saint nick, saint nicholas, christmas eve, delivery, deliveries, delivered, deliver, advertisement, advertisements, ubiquitous, advert, adverts, ad, ads, billboard, billboards, bill board, bill boards, modern life, modern times, media saturation, oversaturation, oversaturated, oversaturate, oversaturates, sell out, sell-out, selling out, sell-outs, sell outs
"Congrats! It's a spork."
Tags:baby, babies, newborn, newborns, deliver, delivers, delivery, delivered, hospital, maternity, maternity ward, maternity wards, inheritance, inherit, inherits, blended inheritance, blend, blends, blending, resemblance, resemblances, parental resemblance, resemble, resembles, resembling, spork, sporks, fork, forks, spoon, spoons