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"I'm well aware that being dead and buried has weakened my position in the corporation."
Tags:dead, status, status update, status updates, coffin, coffins, funeral, funerals, corporation, corporations, corporate mentality, corporate mentalities, weakened position, weakened positions, demotion, demote, demotes, demoted, demotions, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, executive, executives, dark humor, dark humour
Remembers: Elevators can go down as well as up.
"I just want you to know, Mr. Blenner, that, like Mike Ovitz, I don't mind being Number Two."
"I'm taking you off of the Henderson account and putting you into this steel drum."
Tags:steel drum, steel drums, demotion, demotions, demoted, demote, demotes, corporate ladder, business ladder, corporate culture, businessmen, businessman, office politics, promotional ladder, promotional ladders, big account, big accounts, office worker, office workers, lawyer, lawyers, accountant, accountants
'I've been demoted to bromances.'
"He got demoted from human cannonball to human gumball."
Tags:circus, circus act, circus acts, circus performer, circus performers, circus performance, circus performances, gumball, gumball machine, gumball machines, chewing gum, chewing gums, clown, clowns, human cannonball, human cannonballs, stuntman, stuntmen, stunt, stunts, demotion, demotions, demoted, demote, demotes
'No, you weren't demoted, we just created a number of new positions above you.'
Marvin P. Tisdale is plucked from obscurity and returned there in record time.
"If I see noseprints on your window one more time, it's back to a cubicle."
'Due to the recent 'fire' incident, you'll no longer be carrying the torch for this company.'
'You said you wanted more responsibilities. Well, we agree...'
'The good news is I've got a part-time job. The bad news is I started the day with a full-time job.'
"Your're a smart kid, Berenson. How would you like to head our Corporate Dumbing Down Division?"
'I used to think he was one of us, but because of his limited technical skills, I'm demoting him to 'dwarf geek' status.'
"We've decide to use your managerial skills where they're best suited."
"Remember, Crookshank, less is more. Which brings us to your salary."
Tags:less is more, salary, salaries, wage, wages, income, incomes, demotion, demotions, demoted, demote, demotes, demoting, corporate politics, office politics, downsize, downsizing, downsized, downsizes, salary reduction, wage reduction, wage reductions, salary reductions, cutback, cutbacks, cutting back
'We've been demoted from the middle class.'
'I always said he was on the fast track.'
"What do you mean, you're downsizing me way, way down?"
'I was demoted and they're making me wear this hair shirt.'
'Then one day, my power suit came unplugged.'
'Oh, this is much worst than being out of the loop. They've photoshopped me out of the annual report!'
'Me? I was kicked upstairs, downstairs, and everywhere but loose.'
Consultants make the most of their new bottom-feeder status in the evolving NHS
'Once, I was promoted on the third floor and demoted by the time we reached the lobby.'