Depresses Cartoons and Comics

'Really, Frank... The late news is so depressing - and it's the same thing every night... Why do you even turn it on?'

Prozac dispenser.

'I'm an asset to my company, an investment to my wife, a liability to the environment, and a write-off to my children...'

'I've had it for the last seventeen years.'

"Don't worry we'll medicate you through the probationary period."

'Snap out of it.'

'Ms. Green, send in someone to curb my optimism.'

"We've got to lighten up those fortune cookies!"

"I miss the days of folk music."

"Cheer up, mate, it might never...oh, God!"

'Miss Kelsey, I'm feeling a little depressed. Send in the clowns.'

Where nobody knows your name.

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

Whales being separated from their pod and their iPod.

'What do you have for someone on the way down?'

Man under the weather.

'700,000 killed and millions injured... and now, here's Lenny with the lighter side of the news.'

A depressing washing up rota.

'I've been depressed ever since PBS said pigs are smarter than dogs!'

'I've got good news and bad news... you're bi-polar.'

'I had it all - then the IRS found where I had it hidden.'

'... and after periods of denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance... they lived happily ever after.'

'What about if we give our major stockholders samples of our antidepressants?'

'My name is Andre and I could be your waiter this evening. We'll see how it goes.'