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'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'
When vegans pose for photos.
'Your weight problem is partly genetic and partly Boston Cream pie.'
'Last year I went to a chocoholics anonymous meeting twice...once to join and once to renew.'
Frank's Diet Progress.
'That old 'diet and exercise scam' again!'
'I saw the school nurse put that sign up.'
Beware of the fat tax!
'All good things come to end.'
'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'
Diet for sharks
'I don't like it. I wanted one that shape.'
'DIET? EXERCISE?... Can't you just OPERATE?'
'I want you to lose 50 pounds, and then tell me how you did it.'
'Diet? Exercise... can't you just operate?'
Squirrels eating different types of nuts.
The Food Pyramid - Third World Edition
Thin man enters 'Closed and Narrow MRI', heavy man enters 'Open and Wide MRI'
Diet Donuts - (Bigger holes).
'You'll have to forgive my wife.. this is the longest she's ever been on a diet.'
'Your back went out because your front went out.'
'What do you mean I don't get enough milk in my diet? I eat milk chocolate every day!'
'I've put on a lot of weight, but I'll lose it all in the Spring.'
'I keep thinking I'm a Big Mac with fries...'
'In the last 26 years, I've lost 2143 pounds. Unfortunately, in the same period I've gained 2187 pounds!'