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'Well, well, well, looks like we've got ourselves a troublemaker.'
Customer: 'I've got a complaint. This laptop doesn't fit my lap!'
"Everything I eat goes straight to my ass."
"Do you still have a recipe for the low fat rum-bourbon cake that helps you forget your hopes and dreams."
Tags:recipe, recipes, ingredient, ingredients, foodie, foodies, hope, hopes, dream, dreams, bourbon cake, bourbon cakes, cake, cakes, baking, home baking, home-baking, baker, bakers, cake recipe, cake recipes, rum-bourbon cake, rum-bourbon cakes, low fat, low-fat, diet, diets, dieter, dieters, dieting
'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'
"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."
Tags:whale, whales, whaling, whaler, whalers, whaled, fat, fatness, fatter, fattening, weight, weightloss, weight loss, weigh, scale, scaled, proportional, proportion, new year new me, new year's, new years, new year's resolution, resolutions, new year's resolutions, nye, diet, dieting, crash diet, crash dieting, extreme diet, extreme diets, perspective, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, christmas weight
"And, on the lowest end of the caloric spectrum, we offer a leather chew toy."
"I've lost two whole millimetres since Tuesday."
Tags:diet, diets, dieting, weight loss, losing weight, beauty standards, gender issues, thigh, thighs, measuring device, measuring devices, achievement, achievements, success, successes, factory worker, factory workers, break, breaks, lunch break, lunch breaks, break time, break times, thigh, thighs, company property
Lemonade Cleanse - $20 a glass.
Tags:cleanse, cleanses, cleansing, master cleanse, lemonade cleanse, fad diet, fad diets, charlatan, charlatans, marketing, marketing department, marketing departments, lemonade stand, lemonade stands, capitalist, capitalist, capitalists, juice cleanse, juice cleanses, gimmick, gimmicks, health food, healthy eating, healthy life, healthy living, quack, quacks, diet, diets, dieting
"I want you to be more health conscious. Steal a vegetarian's lunch."
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, growing up, child rearing, kid, kids, child, bad parent, bad parents, bad parenting, toxic masculinity, fathers and sons, diet, diets, dieting, vegetarian, vegetarians, vegetarianism, school dinner, school dinners, theft, petty theft, bully, bullies, bullying
"One slice—hold the bread."
Tags:pizza, pizzas, pizza place, pizza parlor, pizza parlour, parlor, parlour, italian, italians, gluten free, gluten-free, low carb, low-carb, keto, ketogenic, ketosis, diet, diets, crash diet, crash diets, dieting, dietting, weight, weigh, weight loss, lose weight, losing weight, fitness, fit, health, women, woman, body conscious, haes, health at every size, calorie, calories, cico, calories in calories out, carb, carbs, carbohydrate, carbohydrates
"In the morning I eat nothing then I wait 4 hours and eat nothing again."
Tags:yoga mat, yoga mats, yoga class, yoga classes, yoga lesson, yoga lessons, fitness class, fitness classes, fitness regime, diet, diets, dieter, dieters, dieting, diet plan, diet plans, workout, workouts, skipping meals, gossip, show off, show offs, showing off, gossiping, weight loss, losing weight
Classic Koala. Diet Koala.
'Maybe our health insurance people aren't sticklers.'
"Lookin' good, Frosty!"
Tags:holiday, holidays, weight gain, weight loss, gain weight, gains weight, gaining weight, lose weight, losing weight, lost weight, compliment, compliments, complimenting, diet, diets, dieting, new year's resolution, new years resolution, resolution, resolutions, christmas, christmas season, snowman, snowmen, frosty, christmas song, christmas songs
'It's the most effective appetite suppressant available,'
Tags:weigh, weighs, weight, weight, gastric band, gastric bands, diet, diets, dieting, obese, obesity, fat, fats, fatty, band, bands, reduce, reduces, reduction, reductions, appetite, appetites, suppress, suppresses, suppressing, suppressant, suppressants, tummy, tummies, belly, bellies, close to home
"I just wish you would try counting your blessings the way you do your carbs."
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, counting your blessings, counting carbs, counting calories, diet, diets, dieting, going on a diet, slimming down, losing weight, watching weight, carb, carbs, carbohydrates, carbohydrate, counting, wish, wishes, wishing, desire, desires, beauty, beauty standards, health, self-confidence, self-esteem, body image
"If you must know—pizza, pepperoni pizza, and I'm going to relish every damn bite."
Tags:food, delivery, pizza, pizzas, pepperoni, woman, women, diet, diets, dieting, eating healthy, healthy eating, healthy diet, eating habits, junk food, unhealthy, health, healthy, vegetables, veggies, vegetables, veggie, fruit, fruits, veg, carrot, carrots, asparagus, pear, pears, apple, apples, bean, beans, relish, enjoy, enjoyment, fitness, giving in, cheat day, cheat days
Thirty Days to a Fatter Wallet
Tags:self help, self help book, self help books, self-help, self-help book, self-help books, diet, diets, dieting, january, new year, new years, resolution, resolutions, weight loss, losing wight, making money, greed, greedy, get rich, getting rich, get rich quick, fad, fads, health fad, health fads, trend, trends, following trends
"Your next fattened kid could be your last."
Tags:guilty pleasure, guilty pleasures, kid, kids, witch, witches, wicked witch, wicked witches, villain, villains, bad guy, bad guys, baddie, baddies, fairy tale, fairy tales, hansel and gretel, cholesterol, high cholesterol, nutrition, nutritionist, nutritionists, nutrition advice, dietitian, dietitians, diet, diets, dieting, fatty food, fatty foods, health food, health foods, cannibalism, warn, warns, warning, warnings, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, bad habit, bad habits, favorite food, favorite foods, favourite food, favourite foods
'It's true that the flavanoids in chocolate can help reduce platelet activation and influence the balance of eicosanoids...but that is not a justification for me to prescribe you a daily dose of 'choco' mini eggs.'
'I'm fat, I eat too much and my blood pressure is high. . . Have a beer and some chips but feel guilty about it.'
'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'
"In today's heath-trend market - coffee is up, fats are mixed, and sugar continues its downward slide."