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'I've been a flatulence analyst for 15 years. . . I'll quit when it stops being fun. . .'
"Shouldn't have had that curried cauliflower soup..."
'Your digestive problems are caused by parasites called 'giardia' and my high fee is caused my parasites called 'malpractice lawyers'.'
"The birthday cake gave me terrible heartburn."
"You son of a b***h! I know where thos ebubbles are coming from!"
"That was a shoe squeak!"
"Large coffee and three bran muffins...hopefully to go!"
'Oh that's actually for here, not to go.'
How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".
Because of Bob's excessive gas, the Alaskan natural gas pipeline make a detour...
Irritable Vowel Syndrome
"It says here you've been experiencing peels of thunderâ�¦"
"I'd wait if I were you. Grandpa just used the litter box."
"This asks if I have "excessive gas". What constitutes "excessive?"
"I've invented underwear that silences flatulence, thus providing plausible deniability."
Irritable Owl Syndrome
"All those in favor of adding another 5 billion organisms to our probiotic just for the fun of it..."
"I ate something that strongly disagreed with me!"
"You should try taking smaller bites!"
'We'll run a few tests, but it's probably just gas.'
"It says that flatulence can prevent dementia."
"How's your digestion?"
"Did the Doctor give you anything for your wind?"