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"Just hand-wringing and watching helplessly."
'So the happy meal didn't work.'
Tags:therapy, therapies, therapist, therapists, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, psychotherapy, psychotherapist, psychotherapists, happy meal, happy meals, fail, fails, failing, failed, scare, scares, scared, upset, sad, mental problem, mental problems, distress, distressed, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Don't get upset with a down market. Someone will come up with an app.'
Parking Yesterday, Parking Tomorrow, But Never Parking Today.
"The distressed-style wood flooring we installed in the kitchen seems to have crept into Fred!"
Home security system
"When I can't sleep, I find that it sometimes helps to get up and jot down my anxieties."
Tags:sleep, sleeping, bad sleep, sleeping badly, no sleep, insomnia, insomniac, insomniacs, anxiety, anxieties, fear, fears, worry, worries, worrier, worriers, stress, stressing, stresses, stressed out, distress, distressed, distressing, cell, cells, prison cell, prison cells, graffiti, writing on the wall, mad, madness, crazy, craziness, mental health, mental health issues, mental health disorders, mental health problems, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes
Today is the first day of the rest of your life - but relax! So is tomorrow!'
"You see, I was pulled out of the hat... I mean, born, early in life."
The retirement party would've been a whole lot nicer if they hadn't been changing all the locks!
Birds screech at a man while he eats eggs.
Poor Flipper. I just opened the cabinet and they fell right out! I knew I should've purchased the 'dolphin safe' tuna.
Tags:dolphin, dolphins, tuna, fish, fishes, flipper, can, cans, tin, tins, danger, dangerous, accident, accidents, dazed, injured, injury, knocked, out, stick, sticks, help, helping, arrive, arriving, arrived, kitchen, kitchens, shock, shocked, distress, distressed, reassure, reassurance, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
Whales being separated from their pod and their iPod.
'I've been sued. Can I counter-sue for the stress caused by being sued?'
'I'd say my client's position was more agitated than distressed.'
'Know of any damsels in distress who are looking for a knight in shining armour?'
'If he was still alive, he would be turning in his grave. . .'
'We're both in danger from this guy.'
'The honeymoon is over - I said 'fall is in the air' and he told me to put on a sweater!'
Teachers panicking because computers are down.
Man biting fingernails.
Old- Fashioned Dental Surgery
please will somebody shake this thing