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Acts of God
'Hey, Naomi, remember last week when you said nothing short of a miracle could save MicroTechnoCom from bankruptcy?'
Zeus reading book titled 'Omnipotent Beings Who Do Too Much.'
"I preferred the Old Testament God."
Tags:old testament, god, gods, deity, deities, divine being, divine beings, lightening strike, lightening strikes, lightning strike, lightning strikes, golfer, golfers, golf course, golf courses, golf player, golf players, new testament, angel, angels, heaven, heavens, divine anger, divine intervention, bible story, bible stories, torah story, torah stories
"The gods must be on-line tonight."
Tags:online, volcano, volcanoes, volcanic eruption, volcanic eruptions, shaman, shamen, priest, priests, god, gods, divine intervention, divine interventions, tribe, tribes, early civilization, witchdoctor, witch-doctor, witchdoctors, witch-doctors, spiritual leader, spiritual leaders, internet, internet addiction, screen time, screentime, screen-time, social media, native, natives
"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."
Tags:prayer, prayers, praying, pray, prays, prayed, divine intervention, divine interventions, higher power, higher powers, god, gods, deity, deities, business deal, business deals, corporate culture, corporate deal, corporate deals, business takeover, corporate takeover, merger, mergers, businessmen, businessman
"I'd like to change my plea."
Tags:supreme court, the supreme court, court of law, courts of law, legal system, the legal system, federal judiciary, federal court, verdict, the verdict, plead guilty, pleading guilty, the voice of god, voice of god, divine intervention, judgement, judgement day, day of judgement, doomsday, point the finger, pointing the finger, sistine chapel, the sistine chapel, creation of adam, michelangelo, rethink, rethinking, guilt, guilty, admission of guilt, admissions of guilt
"Yee yee hee hee how how yip yip."
Tags:caveman, cavemen, prehistory, prehistoric, pre-history, pre-historic, volcano, volcanic, volcanoes, volcanic eruption, religion, faith, worship, idol, idols, idolize, power dynamic, power dynamics, god, gods, coincidence, coincidences, logical fallacy, science, scientific method, act of god, acts of god, religious danger, divine intervention, religious framework, religious interpretation, religious interpretations, primitive, primitives, civilization, civilisation, faith, faiths, religions, natural disaster, anthropologist, anthropologists, anthropology, dog, dogs, omen, omens, miracle, miracles, dog god, dog gods
'Let the fed bait you out!'
"It's official, the world's gone crazy and you're in charge."
Tags:bird, birds, hearing things, hearing voices, power, powerful, new power, divine intervention, divine right, crazy, apocalypse, the apocalypse, end of the world, the end of the world, digital apocalypse, the digital apocalypse, social media, social network, social networks, social networking, influencer, influencers, online influencer, online influencer, modern technology, modern technologies, in charge
Today's Sermon: If you're unhappy with government intervention, try divine intervention.
"But I followed the recipe exactly. Honest I did. With god as my wit.... Oh, sorry.
"So that's a 'no', I take it?"
"Either the gods are angry or it's Malcolm Forbes' birthday."
'Okay, Noah...I'm going to tell you again. Listen very carefully this time.'
"Are you sure this what he said to build?"
"Any suggestion that the government doesn't have a strategy for managing the funding crisis in the NHS is preposterous!"
Always remember... the roadside signs are there for a reason!
Golfer being helped by God
"Did he have any known enemies?"
Lady sees 'Stop' sign above cat at shelter, thinks, 'Well ... I did ask for a sign.'
"Maybe a little less in your own image."
"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"