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"Ever since you yelled at me I've been getting ads from divorce lawyers."
Tags:yell, yells, yelling, yelled, divorce, divorces, divorcing, divorced, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys, ad, ads, advert, adverts.advertisement, advertisements, privacy protection, privacy, data privacy, marriage, row, rows, argue, argues, argued, arguing, argument, arguments, targeted advertisement, target ad
"This isn't working. I'm putting you on a plane back to Ohio."
Tags:husband, husbands, wife, wives, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, divorce, divorced, divorcing, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, solicitor, solicitors, breakup, breaking up, broken up, broke up, dumped, split up, separate, separating, separated, kicked out, lazy, loser, losers, unmotivated, unemployed, mooch
"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"
Tags:pirate, pirates, piracy, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys, treasure, treasures, buried treasure, buried treasures, hiding, hid, hides, bury, buries, burying, buried, cheat, cheated, cheating, cheats, divorce, divorced, divorces, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, lie, lies, liar, liars, lying, lied
"I want to be put on lifestyle support."
Tags:lifestyle, lifestyles, life support, life support system, life support systems, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, divorce, divorces, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, alimony, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, divorce payment, divorce payments, spousal support, maintenance, spousal maintenance, gold digger, gold diggers, goldigger
"That's cool. My parents never fight over me."
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, child, children, kid, kids, divorced, divorced parents, divorces, divorce, divorcing, divorced parents, fight, fights, fought, fighting, fight over, fighting over, fights over, fought over, silver lining, positive aspect, positive aspects, childhood trauma, childhood traumas, childhood, broken home, depression, depressed, depress, depressing, sad, saddened, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys
"It's not a rescue, it's the IRS and my ex-wife's lawyer."
Well I'm not sure if you are aware...but the house is currently in your husband's name.
"I'm prescribing a divorce, but these days it's practically painless."
Tags:doctor, doctors, medical practitioner, medical practitioners, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, medical diagnosis, medical diagnoses, treatment, treatments, prescribe, prescribed, prescription, proscribes, prescribing, prescriptions, divorce, divorces, marriage, marriage trouble, marriage troubles, married life, surgery, surgeries, painless, painlessness, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys
"I'm going out for a quickie divorce -- need anything?"
Tags:divorce, divorcing, divorced, separate, separated, separation, separating, filing for divorce, file for divorce, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, ex, ex husband, ex wife, ex wives, ex husbands, husband, wife, husbands, wives, couple, couples, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, quick divorce, fast divorce, cooperate, cooperation, agreement, all parties agree, spouse, spouses, casual, big deal
"She got the paintings, I got the frames."
Tags:divorce, divorced, divorce, divorcee, divorced couple, distribution of belongings, distribute, separate, separation, marriage, unfair, unfairness, fair, fairness, settlement, settlements, agreements, agreement, pain, paintings, painters, painter, artist, artists, art, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys
"Don't think of it as divorce, Henry. Think of it as freedom...the next time you cheat on me with your secretary, it won't be cheating anymore."
Tags:cheat, cheats, cheating, cheater, cheaters, divorce, divorce, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, silver lining, silver linings, midlife crisis, midlife crises, cliche, cliches, secretary, secretaries, infidelity, husband, husbands, bad husband, bad husbands
'Divorces ‘R Us' is etched in stone on a courthouse.
"Didn't you find it attractive that he was a "Free Range Chicken'?"
Tags:chicken, chickens, free range, free range chicken, free range chicken, free range egg, free range eggs, farm animal, farm animals, divorce, divorces, divorce law, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorney, attractive, attractiveness, regret, regrets, marriages, break up, break ups, breaking up, break-up, break-ups, split up, splitting up, split ups, split-up, split-ups, separation, separations
'What's the difference between a divorce and a circumcision?'
"I do corporate, divorce, and malpractice, but I'm most familiar with leash laws."
"Your Honor, I ask you – is this the toupee of a successful adulterer?"
Tags:judge, judges, court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, divorce lawyer, divorce lawyers, divorce attorney, divorce attorneys, divorce, divorces, divorcing, adultery, adulterer, adulterers, cheat, cheater, cheaters, cheaters, toupee, toupees, bad hair, bad hair day, unattractive, not attractive
'Why do divorces cost so much?' - 'Because they're worth it.'
The put asunder law firm - 'Divorce cases our speciality.'
'Look, if this is to be an amicable divorce, one of you will have to back down and take custody of the children.'
'...and seven years ago I donated one of my kidneys to him. I want it back.'
"Of course, your case against him would be a lot stronger if you had made him sign a pre-peccadillo agreement."
Tags:peccadillo, small sin, unimportant sin, mistake, wrong doing, rule breaking, rule breaker, rule breakers, relationships, relationship, marriage, marriages, married, marry, divorce, divorced, divorcing, separate, separation, separated, file for divorce, filed for divorce, prenup, prenuptial, prenuptial agreement, contract, contracts, lawyer, lawyers, divorce lawyers, divorce lawyer, law firm, law, laws, law firms, legal, legal documents, legal document, dissolution, solicitor, solicitors
Wills, trusts, probate, divorce, San Francisco
'If you run into trouble, give my brother a call. He's an excellent divorce lawyer.'
'Your wife hasn't broken the law, professor - she can leave you even if you do have tenure.'