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'I don't get it...after all the budget cuts to streamline the work force, why aren't we moving faster.'
BLEAK PROSPECTS: DOWNSIZING FOR THE NINETIES
"I know we didn't accomplish anything, but that's what meetings are for."
Tags:business meeting, business meetings, waste of times, wastes of time, wasting time, time waster, time wasters, accomplishment, accomplishments, accomplish, accomplishes, accomplishing, unproductive, manager, managers, boardroom, boardrooms, boardroom meeting, boardroom meetings, meeting, meetings, corporate culture, executive, executives, corporation, corporations, faceless corporation, interruption, interruptions, interrupting, work flow, efficient, efficiency, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring
"You can have Burnett's old office and Burnett's old desk, but it's not right for you to have Burnett's old number."
Tags:replacement, replacements, retire, retires, retiring, layoff, layoffs, laid off, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, jersey, jerseys, football, sports, inherit, inherits, inheriting, inheritance, office, offices, white collar job, white collar jobs, athlete, athletes, retired number, retired numbers, legend, legends, all star, all stars, fire, fires, firing, firings, recession, legend, legends, legendary
"I feel you should know, Maureen. I've decided to downsize our marriage."
"Look, all I'm asking is that we let market forces bring a greater degree of efficiency into our marriage."
Tags:market, wall street, market forces, efficiency, free market, free markets, marriage problem, marriage problems, capitalist, capitalists, capitalism, inefficient, marriages, marriage trouble, marriage troubles, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, efficient, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, cut costs, cutting costs, modern marriage, modern marriages, mankoff
'Sorry we have to let you go, Bob, but it's just a matter of budget priorities.'
"I got rid of all the excess in my life."
Tags:stick figure, stick figures, excess, excesses, modern life, modern attitudes, modern times, millennial, millennials, declutter, decluttering, downsize, downsizing, clutter cure, psychology, park, parks, park bench, park benches, organise, organisation, organised, organize, organization, organized
"I still say we're stretched dangerously thing."
"We've decided, Carmichael, to give you back to the community."
Tags:donate, donates, donating, donation, donations, give back, giving back, community donation, charity, charities, charitable donation, charitable donations, fire, fired, firing, firings, sacked, sacking, sackings, layoff, layoffs, laid off, lay off, lay offs, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring, bearer of bad news, bearers of bad news, messenger, messengers, breaking bad news, cushion the blow, cushioning the blow
The Downsizing Continues
Tags:downsize, downsizes, downsizing, computer, computers, personal computer, personal computers, pc, pcs, p.c., p.c.s, declining sales, computer company, computer companies, storefront, storefronts, downscale, downscales, downscaling, restructure, restructures, restructuring, business loss, business losses, crash, crashes, crashing
'...the acronym was just too cool to shut it down.'
The Three Little Overextended Pigs
Tags:pig, pigs, little pigs, three, three little pigs, fairy tale, fairy tales, children's stories, children's story, fairy story, overextended, budget, budgets, budgeted, budgetted, debt, debts, debtor, debtors, tax, taxes, we, owes, owed, money, saving, savings, finance, financial crisis, downsize, down-size, down size, downsizing, down-sizing, down sizing, broke, flat broke, finances, anxious, anxiety, worry, worried, wolf, real estate, realtor, realtors, moving
"Careful! That's his firing hand."
Tags:firing hand, firing hands, handshake, handshakes, downsizing, downsized, downsizes, downsize, downsizes, layoff, layoffs, lay-off, lay-offs, boss, bosses, manager, managers, management, managements, corporate culture, fire, fires, fired, firing, sack, sacks, sacked, sacking, firing hand, firing hands
"Wilkins, this is Cosgrove. All our offices are now double occupancy."
Boss: 'Change is good!' Employees: 'Who's getting fired?'
"You've done a good job downsizing, but we've decided to outsource your function."
Tags:fired, firing, getting fired, canned, can, canning, getting canned, getting the sack, sacking, sacked, laid off, laid-off, lay off, lay-off, lay offs, lay-offs, redundancy, made redundant, redundancies, downsizing, unemployed, unemployment, downsize, downsizing, outsource, outsourcing, modern life, useless, uselessness, job cut, job cuts, taste of your own medicine, karma, come uppance
"How would you feel about a little place in the city, just to get away from all the hunting and gathering?"
Tags:hunter gatherer, hunter gatherers, hunt, hunts, hunting, hunter, hunters, gather, gathers, gatherer, gatherers, gathering, move, moving, relocate, relocating, downsize, downsizing, city, cities, country, countryside, city vs country, country vs city, get away from it all, caveman, cavemen, cavewoman, cavewomen, prehistoric man, paleolythic man, stone age man, a little place in the country
'In my proposed management reorganization plan, we shuffle our desks around like this, really FAST, announce we've made a 50% staff reduction, and hope nobody notices!'
"The dip in sales seems to coincide with the decision to eliminate sales staff."
Tags:sales, staff, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring, corporation, corporate, profit, profits, profit margin, profit margins, decline, declines, declining, sales decline, sales declines, shrink, shrinks, shrinking, workforce, workforces, work forces, work force, chart, charts, layoff, layoffs, lay-off, lay-offs, laid off
"That's it. I'm taking the buyout."
Tags:office worker, office workers, office work, office job, office jobs, downsize, downsizing, buyout, buyouts, bought out, act of god, acts of god, lightning, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, hit by lightning, fired, firing, getting fired, canned, can, canning, getting canned, getting the sack, sacking, sacked, laid off, laid-off, lay off, lay-off, lay offs, lay-offs, redundancy, made redundant, redundancies, unemployed, unemployment
'Do you want to tell them their department is being downsized again, or should I?'
"In the light of the current financial position management has decided to cancel the Christmas party but. . .you can still come in and use the photocopier to photocopy your bottoms."
"Mr. Herman, you made me laugh and you made me cry, but you didn't make me money."
Tags:firing, firings, fired, sack, sacked, sacking, sackings, layoff, layoffs, laid off, lay off, lay offs, make money, making money, laugh, laughs, laughing, comedy, comedies, drama, dramas, duality, employee, employees, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring, bottom line
'And this is where we attempt to forecast the TRUE size of the spending cuts.'