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"Another glass of absinth? That's your answer to everything."
"Vodka on the rocks, in the rocks, around the rocks, and under the rocks."
". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."
"Why the lorgnette?"
"This drink? It's called loneliness. Care to join me?"
'My wife left me, my car got repossessed and my dog ran off, and now you tell me all the beer is non alcoholic?'
"This job is killing me!!!"
"I'm just tired of being me. . ."
"I'm looking for a wine that goes with my miserable life."
"Daddy's had a tough day at work, love - he'll come and mutter you a bed-time story when he's had a drink."