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"Although you've yet to try your water or even order an entree, how is everything?"
"Good evening folks. Tonight we have the food you didn't finish last time you were here."
"We think it's terribly important that you meet the people responsible for the food you're eating tonight."
"Who gets the linguini with my thumb in it?"
"I think I'll start with the fly soup."
'Is there a cartoonist in the house?'
"Sorry, you must have a tie."
'Shoo-fly pie. Hold the shoo.'
Diner: Chili $3.95 and Chili By-Products $1.50.
'Sorry there's no food. I was kind of hoping you'd bring some.'
'I don't like changing my habits. That's why I'll have what I already know I don't like.'
He knew one sure way to get a table without a reservation.
'...and hold the trilobites.'
"Don't worry, it's not our own food - we swopped lunches..."
'I love the simplicity of this place!'
'Talking or non talking.'
'We'll have to eat out tonight - I washed the dishes today, and I can't do a thing with them.'
'This food's disgusting.' - 'And such small portions.'
Tortoises: 'I'm going to the restaurant.'
'Who ordered the chef's head?'
'I went to the new 'All You Can Eat' restaurant: It was fabulous!'
"Could sir kindly eat more slowly, the signature dish takes a rather long time to make."
"Well, what's your recommendation?"
"Nothing fancy. Just the house sparrow please."
Tags:cat, cats, feline, felines, pet, pets, pet cat, pet cats, cat owner, cat owners, sparrow, sparrows, waiter, waiters, server, servers, eating out, eat-out, eats out, menu, menus, restaurant server, food order, food orders, cat food, house wine, house wines, foodie, foodies, gourmet, gourmets, cat foods
"For those planning to post a nit-picking, fault-finding critique of us online, may I suggest out 'whine and dine' menu."
Tags:critique, critiques, online review, online reviews, restaurant staff, menu, menus, eating out, waiter, waiters, server, servers, eat-out, eat out, eats out, food review, food reviews, restaurant review, restaurant reviews, drunk, drunks, drunkard, drunkards, overindulge, overindulging, overindulged