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"Final, revised government figures for the fourth quarter of 1981 now indicate that the Yankees, not the Dodgers, won the World Series."
Tags:sports, government, bureaucracy, government bureaucracy, government bureaucracies, libertarian, libertarians, conservative, conservatives, slow-moving, government waste, government figure, government figures, inefficient, inefficiency, inefficiencies, baseball, baseball team, baseball teams, economic data, economic news, world series, mankoff
'The dollar fell against all major currencies this morning, and then, while getting up, bumped its head, REALLY HARD, on some sort of coffee table. I'm afraid that's all we have right now. Stay tuned for further updates.'
"The combined total of major-league batting averages was down three and a half points today. Outs outnumbered hits four to one, on a total of fourteen hundred at-bats."
Tags:stock market, stock markets, stocks and bonds, reporter, reporters, sports reporter, sports reporters, newscaster, newscasters, news anchor, news anchors, economic news, finance, finances, financial information, business news, journalist, journalists, telecast, telecasts, telecaster, market, marketing, market expert, market experts, baseball, baseball player, baseball players, batter, batters, batting, batting average, batting averages
'I think my dad's favorite team is the 'the bulls'.'
"In the news tonight: The complete collapse of our economy. More on that after these messages..."
'Don't worry, the money we're throwing at the economy is not U.S taxpayer money. It's borrowed money.'
"Earlier today, the F.D.A. recalled billions of dollars in tainted money."
'After this brief, cheerful message, we'll be back with more 'gloom and doom' economic reports...'
'It says here, the world is heading for a cashless society. I always thought you and I were way ahead of our time!'
'Some good economic news today...the dollar gained against the value of the quarter, dime and nickel...'
'Stocks rose on news that Alan Greenspan - before leaving the fedral reserve - would agree to be cloned.'
'In economic news, stocks and interest rates declined, but the decimal point stayed steady.'
"Stocks tumbled on news that 'The Meek Shall Inherit the Earth' refers to the national debt."
"Today on Wall Street, yesterday's panic selling was replaced by panic buying."
"Your demeanor is just right for giving the economic news, Smithdon."
Tags:news, newsreader, newsreaders, economic news, economy, economics, credit crunch, global economy, recession, recessions, bail out, bail outs, bailout, bailouts, cut costs, cutting costs, budget, budgets, job loss, job losses, redundant, redundancy, redundancies, nervous, anxious, anxiety, anxieties
'Economic indicators are down, but cheer up! The history revisionists will turn this into 'the good old days'...'
'The Fed raised interest rates then lowered them then raise them again, just to keep everyone talking about the economy.'
'I found I'm able to maintain my disposition by not watching any economic or employment news.'
"Tomorrow's weather will not be good... so why not stay at home and enjoy the economy?"
Tags:weather forecast, weather forecasts, economic forecast, economic forecasts, economy, economic downturn, economic downturns, financial news, economic news, market trend, market trends, bull market, bull markets, bear market, bear markets, credit crunch, financial crisis, economic insecurity, economic insecurities
"I haven't told her about the recession...it'll only upset her."
'This economic report is real scary.'
"Stocks tanked in the face of positive economic news just to mess your mind, dude!"
"In economic news: the administration today lauded the addition of 287,000 new jobs, all of which involve crime scene clean-up."
'Finally, something we all understand.'
Bad Economic News.