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"What's to prevent some total stranger anywhere on the world from paying my bills."
'GPS (Grandparent Positioning System)'
"My goodness, it's little Benjie! You've grown into quite a distinguished man!"
"We didn't forget your birthday, Aunt Edith. We just forgot that you're not dead."
"I daresay you can't wait to get your hands on my royal teapot collection."
"Oh honey! Look what your sister sent us."
'I can remember when you were so wide.'