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'When can I stop making wild guesses and start making educated guesses?'
Kid to teacher: 'I'm going to need tech support.'
Student to teacher: 'Do you still get paid if I'm not learning anything?'
Kid to teacher: 'I went with my gut feeling.'
Man to man: 'Everything I needed to know, I learned in kindergarten and forgot in college.'
Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'
Student to teacher: 'After Accelerated Math I think I deserve a rest.'
'I'm sorry, Herbert, but graduating from kindergarten does not come with a hefty retirement package.'
'Billy, I really don't think it's possible to do your homework and watch TV at the same time.'
Teacher in front of freaked out class: 'And to let you know how irritating homework excuses are, we'll start each day with fingernails on the chalkboard.'
Young student to teacher: 'Enough about the ABC's! When do we learn about HDTV's, BMW's and UFO's?'
Teacher to parents: 'Ah - you're right. What do I know about kids? My biological clock went coo-coo years ago.'
Burned student to teacher: 'That's quite a flash card, Miss Nevins.'
Student with money to teacher: 'It's a c-note from my father.'
Student to kid: 'I'm afraid they're going to have to depend on a younger generation.'
Kid to dad: 'I want a jury trial.'
Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?