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'D.N.A. tests show that the fuel pump doesn't belong to this car.'
'The car isn't making funny noises...you are.'
"...I see the problem now."
Tags:mechanic, mechanics, auto mechanic, auto mechanics, car mechanic, car mechanics, problem, problems, engine problem, engine problems, engine trouble, engine troubles, fix, fixes, fixing, fix-it, bottom line, bottom lines, profit, profits, profiting, profit motive, addition, math, math problem, math problems, repair, repairs, repairing, expense, expenses, expensive, handyman, bill, bills, billing
"Nothing serious - just some twenties stuck in your crankshaft."
Tags:auto, problems, money, armored car, armored cars, armoured car, armoured cars, transport vehicle, transport vehicles, engine trouble, engine troubles, engine problem, engine problems, garage, garages, mechanic, mechanics, auto mechanic, auto mechanics, first world problem, first world problems, rich person, rich people, car trouble, car troubles, mankoff
"We've located the problem, sir. It was a breakdown in communication between the engine management system and the working parts!"
Tags:communication, communication breakdown, communication breakdowns, engine trouble, engine troubles, mechanic, mechanics, auto mechanic, auto mechanics, tune up, tune ups, tuning up, car repair, car repairs, auto repair, auto repairs, mechanical problem, mechanical problems, car electronic, car electronics
As meteor approaches couple with flat tire: 'At least nothing else can go wrong!'
'What the...? Why does this &*%! car keep dying?'
'Whatever you do, do not turn off your cell phone. It's the only thing powering the plane right now!'
"There's that squeak again."
"The pilot just sent a group text saying that the plane is having engine trouble and that we should talk brace positions. Doesn't anyone talk anymore?"
Tags:plane crash, plane crashes, airplane crash, airplane crashes, aeroplane crash, aeroplane crashes, brace position, brace positions, group text, group texts, engine trouble, engine troubles, mass text, mass texts, communication, modern communication, smartphone, smartphones, smart phone, smart phones, cell phone, cell phones, mobile, mobiles
"Hmmm...Looks like I've got an oil leak."
Ed's Auto Repair
'OK start her up!'
'We've located the source of that funny noise you've been hearing.'
'Your father stuck it to the man today. He drove around all day with the 'check engine' light on.'
'Yes, I can hear the engine knocking Jack, that's why I've turned the radio up!'
'Would Sir like his squeak to be pleasing?'
'Hear that? This calls for a major readjustment of your bank account.'
'It should be changed every 3000 miles? Better change it three times, then.'
'Well, THERE'S your problem.'
'My car has been acting funny.'
"The bad news is; I can't get it to go. The good news is; It'll be really low on fuel consumption."
Tags:bad news, good news, garage, garages, mechanic, mechanics, mechanical problem, mechanical problems, car problem, car problems, car trouble, car troubles, engine trouble, engine troubles, silver lining, silver linings, positive thinking, positive spin, positive spins, fuel consumption, fuel economy
'I don't like the sound of the engine.'