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A tombstone with an inscription reading: "Eugene R. Traskin - 'Literally died'"
On writing good...
Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.
'My invention is even more remarkable than yours. It is the simple declarative sentence.'
Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.
'And please give me the strength to accept the asterisk and the wisdom to understand what it connotes...'
'Some say I shouldn't be so picky, which is why I'm not going to stop seeing you for ending a sentence with a preposition.'
'Nobody understands the apostrophe.'
Wishing Well, Wishing Good.
'Who.' 'Who.' 'Who.' 'Or is it whom?'
'Without the comma, colons and semi-colons would rise up to oppress us.'
"Don't split your infinitives with me, squire!"
'If they sold more then one book then it would be a BOOKS shop,stupid!'
Exclamation Marks chasing the Question Mark.
'Why English teachers were rarely hung in the old west.'
'And always remember that it is the gritty colon itself, not the half-baked semi-colon, that wields the power to confound even the most erudite minds.'
Alphabet soup...punctuation soup.
What's two and two?
Learn yourself English.
'For snoring?! Hell, that's nothing'. I once shot a man for ending sentence in a preposition.'
'Is there a hyphen in stickup?'
Everything starts with "e" and ends in "g".