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"What happened to the hospital gown you were given?"
"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."
'Doctor, I think they switched my results - this letter I received says I have dense breasts, but wouldn't that mean they'd be perkier - at least above my belly button?'
"Don't be scared! I'm just wearing this old x-ray gear for throwback Thursday."
"Look – now I've gone and caught your stupid disease!"
'This does not look serious.'
'It hurts when I do this.'
Dentist using explosives. (Don't do this at home!)
'Your cholesterol is high.'
"Great news! I found you a cure on Google!"
"Listen to this guy..."Why do they just leave me sitting in here", he says... "Why does it always take the Doctor so long", he says... This stuff never gets old!"
"Actually, we leave patients out in the waiting room so long in order to get a more accurate blood pressure reading!"