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"We have big news!"
"Don't shy. Dive Right in. You're eating for eight now."
"I hear the ocean."
"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, baby, babies, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, family, families, pregnancy, expectant mother, expectant mothers, expecting mother, expecting mothers, new baby, new babies, new mom, new moms, new mum, new mums, new mother, new mothers, new parent, new parents, parent-to-be, parents-to-be, mom-to-be, mum-to-be, mother-to-be, day care, day care, daycare, daycare, nursery school, nursery schools, childcare, kindergarten, kindergartens, preschool, preschools, artisan, free-range, trend, trends, trendy, first-time parent, first-time parents, modern parent, modern parents, modern parenting, modern parenthood, modern life, raising kids, raising children, education, school, schools, schooling
"Fine. If it's a boy, we'll call him Boy. But if it's a girl I want to call her McKenzie."
'Okay, now in order to start your epidural, I'm gonna need you to curl up into a ball. My assistant, Mindy, who's a 90 lb. contortionist, will show you how easy it is ... '
Tags:epidural, epidurals, pregnancy, pregnancies, mother, mothers, expectant, expecting, expecting mothers, expectant mothers, ob gyn, obstetrics, obstetrician, obstetricians, nurse, nursing, baby, babies, baby wards, hospital, hospitals, medical, contortionist, contortionists, maternity ward, maternity wards
'Would you like your ultrasound photos standard, high definition, 3-D, or 4K ultra HD?'
Tags:ultrasound, ultrasounds, maternity, maternities, photo, photos, photograph, photographs, high-definition, high definition, standard, resolution, resolutions, 3d, 3-d, pregnancy, pregnancies, expectant mother, expectant mothers, expecting mother, expecting mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers
"If she can give birth every twenty seconds, what's taking mom so long? It's been like eight months already?"
"Of course I don't mind not drinking...I love being the designated driver all the time. . . drinking water at our favorite Brewery while my husband drinks our favourite IPA. . . I mean, what's not like, right?"
Tags:beer, beers, brewery, breweries, taproom, taprooms, designated driver, desginated drivers, pregnancy, pregnancies, expectant mother, expecting mother, expecting mothers, expectant mothers, motherhood, maternity, responsibility, baby, babies, child, responsibilities, brewery, breweries, husband, husbands, wife, wives
"If it was intentional, you pass - if it wasn't, you fail."
'I already have four girls. If it's a girl we'll name her Sue. If it's a boy we'll name him Hooray.'
No smoking when pregnant.
"A librarian, huh? Hopefully one with a sense of irony...you're overdue!"
Womb with a View
Tags:e. m. forster, womb, wombs, pregnancy, pregnancies, pregnant woman, pregnant women, expecting mother, expecting mothers, expectant mother, expectant mothers, view, views, scenery, hotel, hotels, window, windows, english literature, classic, classics, feminism, feminist, feminists, famous literature
Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"
Baby name suggestions.
"There's a scheduling conflict - I'd like to move her morning sickness up to the afternoon."
Tags:morning sickness, pregnancy, pregnancies, expectant mother, expectant mothers, expecting mother, expecting mothers, scheduling conflict, scheduling conflicts, doctors, appointment, appointments, doctor, nurse, exam, schedule, morning, afternoon, reschedule, checkup, checkups, check up, check ups
Baby on board. . . Beer on Board
Big book of daft names for kids.
"I'm concerned, I haven't had a period in over 8 months."
"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"
Tags:birds and the bees, doctor, doctors, bee sting, bee stings, pregnancy, pregnancies, expectant mother, expectant mothers, expecting mother, expecting mothers, doctor, doctors, doc, docs, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, family planning, family life, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood
'It's a chicken.'
"Let's name the baby Grandmother, after your grandmother."
Unborn baby texts his parents.
Tags:pregnancy, pregnancies, pregnant mother, pregnant mothers, expecting mother, expecting mothers, expectant mother, expectant mothers, cell, cells, cellphone, cellphones, mobile, mobiles, phone, phones, smartphone, smartphones, text, texts, text message, text messages, texting, unborn, baby, babies
'Don't tell anybody, I'm expecting a doll.'