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'Regular or not, sir, you can't claim this as your second home.'
Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?
'I'm getting fed up with these constant comparisons with politicians.'
"If we want to cut insurance fraud we have to bring in the experts..."
'He gets my vote.'
'We have to be careful the press are complaining about MP's nepotism again.'
Crime means you have to take the money and run. In politics you run, then take the money...!
'All the criticism of dysfunctional politicians is hard to take. We could use a free junket to a tropical paradise.'
'What do you say to people who think politicians are only interested in money?''...Give me a fiver and I'll tell you.'
'Welfare cuts might be painful but there's only so much we can afford.'
"Politicians can't make the trains run on time but they never miss the gravy train."
What do you say to people who think politicians are only interested in money...give me a fiver and I'll tell you.
Has this got anything to do with MP's expenses, Sheila?
Allotments: Us and Them.
'The expenses row has really put me off politics . . . so I'm going to vote for racism, bigotry and hatred instead.'
'He works late at night and always has lots of money - I thought he was a burglar but I've just found out he's an M.P.!'
'Coming up after the break - the brand new extreme makeover show - 'pimp my parliamentary reform'.'
'I got it on expenses...'
A word from your MP about expenses.
'Get me my MP, I need some advice on fiddling the books!'
'It's a bit demoralising when the Sheriff can claim it all back on expenses.'
'It seems natural enough after being an MP.'
MP in a record shop.
'Wouldn't it be less of a burden on your conscience if you told the parliamentary standards committee rather than me.'