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'You realize, of course, there's nothing wrong with me. . . I'm only here 'cause of your 50%-off-first-visit coupon and I am not a serial bargain shopaholic.'
'Got to rush... It's my sell-by date!'
'Relax. I've come for your high yield 30 year Treasury bonds. They're about to expire.'
"I'm sorry, sir, but your cash is expired."
'Dang! The water's expired.' (Spring Water).
'It's a Twinkie and the expiration date is still good!'
'What do you mean, our marriage license has expired?'
Coupon Funerals: 'Let us remember his life, not his expiration date. Dor we know our Saver will redeem him.'
How the grim reaper entertains himself when business is slow.
Tags:prank, pranks, prankster, pranksters, practical joke, practical jokes, joker, jokers, joke, jokes, joking, sense of humour, sense of humor, grim, grims, grim reaper, grim reapers, thanatos, angel of death, slow day, slow days, expiry date, expiry dates, expiration date, expiration dates, grocery shop, grocery shops, grocery store, grocery stores
"Oh...Password expired...whew! At first I thought it was me."
Expired Parking Meter
Tags:parking meter, parking meters, parking metre, parking metres, parking ticket, parking tickets, car park, car parks, parking lot, parking lots, ticket machine, ticket machines, coffin, coffins, mourner, mourners, griever, grievers, grief, expired, expiry date, expiry dates, expiration date, expiration dates
"At least he went quick. Although not quick enough, I'm afraid. This discount coupon expired last month."
Tags:funeral home, discount coupon, funeral arrangements, death, dying, funeral, funerals, funeral cost, funeral costs, funeral homes, discount coupons, discount, discounts, undertaker, undertakers, getting a deal, frugal, tightwad, special offer, special offers, watch your pennies, expiry date, best before date
"Guess who expires next..."
'Yeacch! Did you check the expiration date on this thing?'
'I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you're not expected to last much longer after your expiration date.'
'I wanted a tattoo that makes me look inedible.'
"No, it's my husband that's expired. Is his credit card still good?"
Tags:death, dead, relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, dead husband, dead husbands, widow, widows, mourning, mourner, mourners, grieving, bereaved, expired, expiry date, expiry dates, money, credit card, credit cards, shopping, shopper, shoppers, woman, women, stereotype, stereotypes, black humor, black humour, dark humour, dark humor, consumerism, retail
'The bad news is you've lived well beyond your expiration date.'
"You have an inordinately long shelf life, for a cupcake."
'An expiration date? Gee, all these years, I thought it was just a bunch of freckles!'
'Check the expiration date on those beans, They always put the oldest cans on the top,'
"I figured since woman are always using me..."
"When you reach your expiration date, would you like to be crushed or recycled?"
"The expiration date says it will only be avant-garde for nine more years."