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Non-Fat Milk/Low-Fat Milk/Full-Fat Milk. . . Ah, What The Hell.
'It's wheat-free, dairy-free, fat-free, nut-free, sugar-free and salt-free...enjoy!
'Do you want the regular IV or fat-free?'
Fat-free way; carb-free way.
Dieting Options: Non-fat, low-fat, stretch pants.
"Dear Santa, Enjoy the fat-free cookies, although you don't strike me as health-conscious."
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"Spinach is fat free, sugar free, and cholesterol free, and it looks it."
I've repositioned your portfolio to fat-free products....
"If it's gluten-free, peanut-free, lactose-free and fat-free, why does it cost more?"
New arrival in Heaven sees a Manna vending machine.
'Well that's just great. As if this stuff didn't already suck enough.'
'All dishes without ft...without salt...without sugar.'
"Everything is fat-free. So why am I still fat?"
'I always shop here. They don't sell low fat ice cream so the guilt is gone.'
Trans Fat Free Cookies - Trans fat has killed people. Are you one of them?
'Too many people in our state are overweight, Senator. They want fat-free pork.'
'We squeeze in more pulp and suddenly we're health food!'
'How come if a product has less, like sugarless, fat free, or fewer calories, it cost more!?'
'I have to go on a diet. Evidently the best things in life aren't fat free!!'
The Fat-Free Mayo Clinic.
Finally, a news network that doesn't fill me up...it's 97 fact free!
'I hope you like it -- it's fat-free blubber.'
Light Distilled Water
"Fat-free milk and sugar-free cookies? What kind of sick joke is this?"
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