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"The Emperor is naked - and he has a flabby butt!"
"I hate the way that people stare at us just because I'm taller than you."
"And would you describe yourself as 'active', 'very active' or a 'lardy a**e waste of space'?"
"In some ways it'll be a relief when the obesity time-bomb does finally go off."
"Does this dress make me look fat?"
"And Maureen's lost...nothing! Let's have a big chair for Maureen!"
How to loose weight
"Honey, if you think the red cap is making me look fat then I'll buy a blue one."
The Four Fat Horsemen of the Apocalypse
"The nurse says I'm morbidly obese. . . so what are you going to do about it!"
"Bad news I'm afraid. . . We've had all your results back and it does appear that you are in fact, fat."
Weight Watchers: StOUT and thIN Desk Organizers
"I don't know why I put weight on, I hardly eat enough to keep a sparrow alive."
"They grow so fast. In my day, you didn't become morbidly obese until adulthood."
"The school is still out on precisely the right vernacular but I think it is generally agreed that 'humongous fat bastard' is overstepping the mark!"
"No, obesity doesn't run in my family - it walks."
"40% of the population is overweight, but 20% seems to be down to you."
"You've got the body of a teenager...unfortunately."