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"Got things worked out with that new son in law yet?"
"I hope your parents appreciate the effort I make to get dressed and leave the house."
"One day son, all this will probably belong to some little floozy you'll marry."
'I know that right now I don't have too much to offer to your daughter, but I promise you that in a few million years my fossilized remains will cost more than one hundred dollars a barrel.'
'My wife, I worship the ground she walks on.' - 'Her father owns the property, right?'
'I once had pigs-in-a-blanket but I don't let my husband's relatives stay the night anymore.'
Lisa would become the first demon ever to burn in hell.
'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'
'It's strange that you should ask for my daughter's hand. Only this morning she told me she wants to give you the elbow.'
'I'm afraid Luke didn't hit it off very well with daddy.'
'I'm afraid it's Daddy you need to impress-he's an R.S.P.C.A Inspector!'
'There's lots of fine,honest,upstanding young men out there and she takes up with a banker!'
'I don't want anything for myself...But if it's not too much trouble, please send my mother a son-in-law who's a Doctor...'
"Let me get this straight ... you're a lawyer and a priest ... so you're a father in law?"