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"I'm doing a think piece on me."
'My god, this is it... I'm finally getting my fifteen minutes of privacy.'
'Working With What You Have' "May I buy you ladies a drink? I once rode in an elevator with Ernest Borgnine."
"Mom, turn on the TV!"
"Well, I guess our fifteen minutes is about up."
'It looks like your fifteen minutes of fame is about over.'
"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."
'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'
'Oh that! That was my fifteen minutes of fame.'
'Your 15 minutes of fame happened during your nap but it was so good I forgot to wake you.'
"I auditioned for a reality show...and I got picked!"
'Fifteen minutes! I want to be famous for one tweet.'
'The girl on the right, danced with a man, who danced with a girl, who danced with the Prince of Wales.'
'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'
'My parents are real losers...neither of them has ever been a celebrity.'
"Dang! There I am! I'm in Riding Low magazine! You know what this means? My life will change forever...I'm a celebrity...people will ask for my autograph!"
"Sorry, but due to the large number of c-list celebrities we're no longer able to guarantee everyone their 15 minutes of fame."