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"Oh, the humiliation."
'At least you saved the cat.'
'Just this once sir, we need the overtime.'
'He thought the fire alarm was the bell for last orders, and ran towards the bar.'
'What coincidence - I'm conducting a fire brigade time and motion study too.'
'You'd better get something for that sneeze. We can't keep coming out like this.'
'Fight fire with fire is really just a saying...'
Fire Marshall Chanukah
'Boys, we've got a burning pigsty! Forget the hoses, grab the BBQ sauce and let's go!'
'Boy this is a boring job...'
'Yes dear, the plants have just been watered.'
'The fire brigade are on the way. But in the meantime, I'm totally posting this online.'
'I called the Fire Brigade but he was out on another job!'
Fire alarm reads: 'IN CASE OF FIRE: Run like hell.'
Fireman on a toilet break
Fire-man in toilet
'It was such a big tree when I was young: The Fire Brigade had to rescue me a number of times...'
Fire at the Bisto Factory
Advanced Fireman Test
I got woken by my neighbour's fire alarm last night. - 'I went to dial 999 but I hit the 'hash' key by accident.' - 'I got put through to the Jamaican Embassy...' - 'They just said, 'Take it easy, Peel. Everything is gonna be alright.'' -
'It's a good job I was trapped by my wooden leg and not my good one, son!'
'Which emergency service do you require, sir - Fire, Police, Ambulance, or Loan-shark?'
"It's off. The anti-passive smoking lobby, the Wood Conservation Society and the fire brigade have all filed complains."
'Call the Fire Brigade - the tree's stuck up the cat.'
"Sorry ma'am. My computer says this is the wrong building."