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Ron, I used this while you were on vacation. Please refill. Love, mother.
"Shouldn't you rake those up first and then set them on fire?"
Tags:leaf, leaves, clearing leaves, raking, raking leaves, rake, rakes, chore, chores, housework, yardwork, landscaping, landscaper, lawn, lawns, yard, yards, garden, gardens, gardening, fire, fires, on fire, fire hazard, fire hazards, fire safety, unsafe, safety hazard, safety hazards, bad idea, bad ideas, dangerous, dangerous idea, dangerous ideas, dumb, dumb idea, dumb ideas, husband, husbands, man, men, marriage, nag, annoy, berate, bother
"Try rolling on the ground! Roll around on the ground!"
Tags:christmas, noel, yule, xmas, santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, elf, elves, santa's helper, santa's helpers, chimney, chimneys, going down the chimney, fireplace, fireplaces, smoke, fire, hearth, hearths, on fire, fire safety, roll, stop drop and roll, roll on the ground, advice, firemen, fireman, firewoman, firewomen, firefighter, firefighters, safety, fire hazard, fire hazards, dangerous, risky
'Ma'am, don't you know that dirty chimneys are a fire hazard?'
A dolls house with a working chimney.
In case of fire: Parachutes
Forest Fire Hazard
'And do we really need scarves for warmth? And what's with the stove top hats?!'
"This is what happens when you lack a brain and throw your own surprise birthday party."
Happy Birthday Marsha Mallow
"Hey! Who put gas in this bucket?!"
Emperor Nero: In Case Of Fire Break Glass.
'...You'll set off the fire alarm!'
'I don't think it's cooked yet, but there's smoke coming out of the oven.'
"I've got a sensor to let me know if I've left the stove on."
'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'
'Nice jack o'lantern, son. Now make sure to blow out the candle so we don't burn down the cat.'
"I'm sorry, Dear, but my shopping was so rushed I forgot the batteries for the smoke alarms."
Nerve-racking Chanukah moments
"Larry's made new friends learning to cook. He knows everyone at the Recipe Emergency Hotline."
It is illegal to fall asleep under a hairdryer in Florida.
"After receiving the third commandment Moses was alarmed to see the Fire Prevention Officer."
"Goodnight honey...did you remember to unplug the baby?"
Tags:fire hazard, fire hazards, fire risk, fire risks, iron, irons, electrical iron, electrical irons, plug, plugs, health and safety, health & safety, baby, babies, childcare, child-care, child care, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, fatherhood, father, fathers, dad, dads
'Goodnight honey... did you remember to unplug the baby?'