Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
'When you said this was an eye examination for Macular Degeneration, I didn't think you meant an actual exam!'
Baby Boomers will be 100 before they think they're 50.
"Well, dear, we finally finished reading all the manuals to life. Shall we go out and do some living now?"
'Why John, I remember you when you were this high.'
'Mary, you haven't been taking your calcium pills, have you?'
Aging Sign # 23: you're dehydrated and yet up peeing all night.
Flo's kids had a harder time adjusting to their mother's hot flashes than she did.
'When I asked if she was critical I didn't mean verbally!'
'Your breathing test results would be normal ... if you were 3'8' and 150 years old.'
'Do you have this chart in Big Print'
Guide To Elderly Services - Care & Don't Care.
'At least we won't have to worry if our pension plans are any good.'
'Pre Reunion Jitters' 'I've added a few minutes to that hour glass figure I had in high school.'
'He's our new Geriatric specialist!'
In Case of Funding Emergency, Break Glass.
'Thank God for periodontal disease. '
'Instead of looking for the Fountain of Youth, we should look for the Fountain of Age so we can take advantage of senior citizen discounts that are rampant in the New World.'
'Are you sure you've only been here an hour? My records show you've been parked here since 1908.'
New Geriatric Aid.
'You're taking this Grey Nomad stuff a bit seriously aren't you'
I assure you the animals didn't suffer. All of our meat comes from animals who died naturally of old age while vacationing in Miami.
The only drug this league tests positive for is Geritol.
'Try and stay alive until the government have finished their consultation process.'
"No, your body is actually alive and well back on earth - your mind has just arrived at the gates of blissful dementia."
Tags:dementia, alzheimer's, alzheimers, alzheimer's disease, alzheimers disease, elderly, geriatric, geriatrics, old age, death, dying, heaven, gates of heaven, afterlife, afterlives, brain dead, brain death, mental health, brain disease, brain disorders, impaired reasoning, personality, changes, mental processes, memory loss, bliss