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"I had this horrible nightmare that I went to bed in my toupee and spent the entire night looking like an idiot."
Tags:toupee, toupees, hair, hair loss, bald, balding, hair thinning, thin hair, receding hairline, going bald, gone bald, bald-headed, fake hair, wig, wigs, men, middle aged, husband, wife, husbands, wives, couple, couples, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, spouse, spouses, not a dream, reality, real life, dream, dreams, dreaming, nightmare, nightmares, night terror, night terrors
"Shaving your head takes the guesswork out of going bald."
Tags:bald, balding, alopecia, losing hair, losing your hair, going bald, ageing, getting old, getting older, middle age, middle aged, bald patch, bald patches, receding hairline, receding hairlines, shaving your head, vain, vanity, hairloss, hair loss, advice, good advice, giving advice, beauty tip, beauty tips, insecure, insecurities, guesswork
'I don't care if you're going bald, it's just plain wrong.'
"I've had my teeth whitened my vision corrected, my face tightened and my hair implanted. Now I'd like to have my birth certificate changed."
Tags:longing younger, ageing, looking young, getting old, getting older, vain, vanity, dob, date of birth, birth certificate, birth certificate, false identity, new identity, new identities, teeth whitening, cosmetic surgery, plastic surgery, hair loss, losing hair, going bald, alopecia, rich person, rich people, the one percent, the 1 percent, wealth divide, wealth gap
"I need you to take over while I'm on the road to fuller, thicker hair."
Tags:executives, executive, business executives, business executive, business executives, manager, managers, boss, bosses, business manager, business managers, bald, gone bald, going bald, hair loss, losing hair, losing your hair, alopecia, recovery, recovering, road to recovery, priorities, bad priorities, wrong priorities, stand-in, stand-ins, stand in, stand ins
"I'm sure it's a rug."
Tags:businessman, businessmen, balding, hair loss, alopecia, bald, no hair, losing hair, going bald, hiding, covering, head, heads, embarrassed, embarrassment, wig, wigs, toupee, toupees, rug, rugs, carpet, carpets, gossip, gossiping, wordplay, word play, man, men, beauty, health, hairstyle, hairstyles, hair
'A spoiler is standard on all sports cars. It helps protect your hair transplant.'
'I'm afraid your baldness is a result of your hairitage.'
The four stages of male hair loss.
Half full head of hair, half empty head of hair.
"We took a yachting holiday last year, strayed into the Bermuda Triangle, miraculously made it home somehow, but Brian's hair disappeared."
"Now, you said you wanted a grownup haircut."
Tags:middle age, middle aged, ageing, getting old, getting older, hairloss, bald, balding, going bald, bald patch, bald patches, alpoecia, haircut, haircuts, new haircut, hairstyle, hairstyles, hairstyle, hairdo, hairdos, hairdresser, hairdressers, growing up, child rearing, kid, kids, child, cruel jokes
Never mess with someone who's having a bad hair day.
"If it weren't for lobby security tapes I wouldn't even know I had a bald spot on the top of my head."
Tags:offices, office worker, office workers, security, security camera, security cameras, security tape, security tapes, cctv, cctv camera, cctv cameras, balding, hair, hair loss, losing hair, going bald, age, aging, middle age, old age, office security, security guard, security guards, alopecia, baldness, dcdb, snoopers charter, snooper's charter, snoopers' charter
Hair restorer/Hair remover.
Hair Transplants/A new you... Barber/A new you unplugged.
'I've been having one long, continuous bad hair day for the past 25 years.'
Cyclops Notices He's Getting Bald and Decides That's the Last Straw
'Are those extensions, Bob?'
'What fresh hell is this? I just spent 50 grand on hair plugs.'
At the Hair Club for Men's extreme-testing facility.
"I'm sorry, son. My father was bald, I'm bald and you're likely to be bald too."
Tags:gene, genes, genetic, genetics, bald, bald eagle, bald eagles, eagle, eagles, bird of prey, birds of prey, ornithologist, ornithology, ornithologists, birdwatcher, birdwatchers, birder, birders, birding, recessive gene, recessive genes, dominant gene, dominant genes, baldness, going bald, losing hair, loses hair, hair loss, male pattern baldness, wildlife
"I'm no show dog - I have Alopecia!"