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'Money can't buy happiness? Then how much to lease it?'
Tags:psychiatrist, psychiatrists, shrink, shrinks, head shrink, head shrinks, head doctor, head doctors, session, therapy, treat, treats, treated, treating, money cant buy happiness, happy, happiness, lease, rent, hire, rich, wealth, wealthy, misunderstood, misunderstand, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'It looks like mad cow disease.'
'I just got back from Hawaii. I learned 'aloha' means both 'hello' and 'good-bye'. Now, I don't know whether I'm coming or going.'
'Before we start... get off the couch.'
The baseball players psychiatrist.
Psych up for the game!
'Regarding your sadness, try painting on a smile instead.'
Tags:clown, clowns, makeup, make up, smile, smiles, frown, frowns, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, shrink, shrinks, head shrink, head shrinks, advice, advised, advises, advising, adviser, advisers, advisor, advisors, paint, painting, painted, paints, face paint, face paints, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'Perhaps I didn't make myself clear at our last session when I told you 'Today is the first day of the rest of your life'.'
Tags:psychiatrist, psychiatrists, shrink, shrinks, head shrink, head shrinks, today is the first day of the rest of your life, baby, babies, session, sessions, therapy, treat, treats, treatment, treatments, treating, treated, misunderstand, misunderstood, misunderstands, mistake, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'This is obviously a cry for help.'
'Never mind what I see. The better question is, why are you obsessed with my bodily functions?'
Tags:octopus, octopi, ink, inking, inked, inks, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, shrink, head shrink, head shrinks, shrinks, head doctor, head doctors, counseling, counsel, counsels, counseled, treat, treated, treats, treating, splotch, splotches, ink stain, bodily functions, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
Back in 5 mins.
'It helps to bring out the inner child.'
'Okay, now, it's your turn, you little jerk!'
'Frankly, Mrs. Wickham, I liked the furniture better the way it was.'
'I'm here because my bartender is on holiday.'
'That inner voice you've been listening to was your iPod.'
'But enough about my problems and my unreasonable wife... let's talk about your problems!'
'I've got good news and bad news... you're bi-polar.'
'I not only covet my neighbor's wife... I'm also very fond of his portfolio.'
'I won't be coming to see you again. I've purchased a therapeutic mattress.'
'I have a half-a-mind to diagnose you a schizophrenic.
Scott Westmoreland PhD - Psychologist and road rage therapy.
'No... you first.'