Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
'Your HMO isn't convinced that you need surgery. When I say 'action!' start writhing and moaning wildly.'
'Let's see, what's next...Oh, any pre-existing conditions?'
"You've come to me just in time. Your HMO is going to stop covering this."
"I'd like to help you, but you're in a different H.M.O."
'You shoulda checked the fine print in your HMO policy. First I have to deliver two pies over in Elmira, then I'll get you to Mercy Medical.'
'Your insurance doesn't cover acts of God, like age related illness and accidents.'
'According to this, the only drug your HMO covers is aspirin, and it has to be generic.'
"I'm sorry, Timmy, but Mr. Jeter's promise to hit you a home run isn't covered by your existing HMO."
'Sorry, but your health care only covers me telling you what it doesn't cover.'
Playing doctor: 'This time I get to play the HMO bureaucrat who decides if you live or die.'
"Large, double sausage, extra cheese? Buddy, for a pie like that we need a note from your HMO."
'Large, double sausage, extra cheese?? Sorry, but with a pie like that we need a note from your HMO.'
"Are we cold blooded enough to run an H.M.O?"
"Your HMO won't cover this so I'm going to rub some salt in these wounds."
"You'll be awake during the entire procedure. Your HMO won't cover the Anesthesia."
"It's curiosity and your HMO won't cover it."
"Now here's a difficult case. Her vitals are strong, but her HMO is weak."
"I'm sorry, that was a 'cheap shot'. It's the only kind your HMO covers."
"I could use a real shot in the arm, but my HMO doesn't cover it."
'Your insurance will cover you...but only with this blanket.'
"Your tests are back. We've ruled out anything covered by your HMO."
"Just find something covered by my HMO..."
Since his girlfriend did not have insurance, Kyle tried to smuggle her in for treatment through his HMO.
"He's in an H.M.O. Get some of the King's horses and a few of the King's men."
The H.M.O. Expensive Care Unit: The we all have to go sometime ward.