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Beltway Car Pool"Under the proposal, regional 'health alliances'—essentially, giant insurance-buying pools—would collect money from employers and individuals and in return offer them a variety of competing health plans. A national health board would control the alliances' budgets and prevent them from raising insurance premiums over a certain amount. Cool!"
Tags:politics, politician, politicians, government, governments, capitol hill, washington, washington d.c., congress, house of representatives, representative, representatives, congressman, congressmen, senate, senator, senators, federal, united states, us, u.s., united states of america, usa, u.s.a., america, american, inside the beltway, beltway, american politics, business, healthcare, health care, insurance, health insurance, medical insurance, medicaid, medicare, obamacare, national health board, insurer, insurers, risk pool, risk pool, money, health plan, health plans, health alliance, health alliances, proposal, proposals, insurance premium, insurance premiums, kid, kids, child, children, explanation, explaining, carpool, carpools, car pool, car pools, carpooling, word play, wordplay
"Sire, they also want dental."
Tags:health insurance, health care plan, health-care plan, health care insurance, health care cover, health plan, health cover, health, magna carta, king john, john, first barons' war, magna carta libertatum, dental, dentist, insurance, ppo, preferred provider organization, king, knights, rebellion, 1215, runnymede, political demands, political demand
"We don't offer a health-care plan. Instead, we have Lou persuade you not to get sick."
Tags:health-care, health care, health, healthy, insurance, health insurance, health plan, cover, health-care plans, health care plans, health care plan, health-care cover, private health, ppo, ppo plan, preferred provider organization, preferred provider organization plan, medicine, medical, medicals, threat, threatening, persuade, gangster, implicit threat, health coverage, health care coverage, health-care coverage, coverage
"By your own admission, Bennett, you have twelve children. I'm afraid our insurance company defines that as a preexisting condition."
Tags:health insurance, health plan, health plans, health care plan, health care plans, insurance, insures, health-care plan, health care plans, health-care plans, health care plan, health care cover, health-care cover, preexisting condition, preexisting conditions, health, healthy, children, child, kid, kids, large family, health problem, health problems, perspective, approach
"There will be a bit of a wait while we figure out a market solution to your problem."
Tags:emergency, doctors, medical, medicine, a&e, accident and emergency, accident & emergency, emergency room, er, free market, health insurance, health cover, health plan, healthcare cover, health-care cover, healthcare covers, health-care covers, crisis, healthcare plan, health-care plan, healthcare plans, health-care plans, single payer health care, universal health care, libertarian, laissez faire, laissez-faire, market solution, the free market, the free market provides, capitalism, socialism, health, care, doctors, medicine
"Let's play health care!"
Tags:health care, health-care, health plan, health-plan, healthcare plan, health care plan, healthcare plans, health care plans, health-care plans, health-care plan, health insurance, insurance, insurances, precocious, health care coverage, health-care coverage, children, child, kid, kids, playing, plays, playing doctor, realistic, not childish
"Is there a doctor who accepts Medicaid in the house?"
Tags:health, healthy, medical care, medicaid, health insurance, health insurances, health-insurance, health plan, health-care plan, healthcare plan, healthcare provider, insurance, health coverage, health-care coverage, medicaid, doctor, doctors, social insurance, social welfare program, social welfare, welfare program, affordable care act, aca, care, theatre, uninsured, insured, insuring, health-care plans, health plans, obamacare, insurance coverage, coverage
Doctor to man: 'Laughter is the best medicine, but it's not covered in your health plan.'
'It's the new company health plan. We get an apple a day and plant the seeds for our retirement health benefits.'
"I sure hope we can sign up for health care before we die of natural causes."
Tags:healthcare, health, care, health care, health insurance, healthcare plan, healthcare plans, health care plans, health-care, health-care plans, health plans, health plan, death, dying, dies, old, old age, affordable care act, aca, obamacare, obama, website, internet, slow, online, crash, obamacare website crash, wait, waiting, medicare, medicaid, digital, technology, technologies, computer, computers
'Your health plan covers everything but your deductible is equal to your net worth.'
'Of course, a full-body scan can be done more cheaply if you go through airport security.'
'Yes, we do have a group health plan. When everyone has the same symptoms, you all go as a group to see the doctor!'
"This patient has a rare form of medical insurance."
Tags:health insurance, insurance, insurances, health plan, health plans, healthcare plan, healthcare plans, health-care, healthcare coverage, health-care cover, health-care coverage, health care cover, healthcare cover, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, diagnosis, diagnose, medicaid, hospital, hospitals, hospital bed, priority, priorities
"I can't afford this plan either. Do I need to remind you again that I'm just a small businessman?"
"Laughter is the best medicine, which is fortunate, since that's all our health plan now offers."
'Our health plan is quite simple. You get a shiny apple each day.'
"And when the time comes the company will put you to sleep at its own expense."
'Here at Crowe Maritime Products, we like to let employees choose a health care plan that suits their needs. Now, step right up and spin the wheel.'
'You know, our health plan doesn't cover dental.'
"I just KNEW something like this would happen when I switched health plans. The old plan let me pick my own doctors!"
Tags:health plan, medical insurance, probe, probes, sci-fi, science-fiction, medicine, health insurance, insurance, physician, physicians, doctor, doctors, care, medical, examination, exam, healthcare, ufo, aliens, alien, abduction, abductions, alien abduction, space, spaceship, paranormal, science fiction, sci fi
'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'
'Under my health plan, alternative medicine, including placebos and hypochondria remedies will be covered.'
To you, hyochondria, to me, it's getting the most out of my company health plan.
'The company health plan doesn't cover surgery, but we do have a guy in sales who is pretty good with his hands.'