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'Your insurance only covered the removal of the damaged organ...you'll have to put the transplant in yourself.'
'I hope these make you feel better, because they're all you're getting.'
''AAAIIIGGGHHH'...So would that be a 'yes' to the question 'I believe my needs are understood'?'
'My prescription: digital textbooks.'
'It's important to treat all our patients as individuals...this for example is individual number 78/yh5-fg34c.'
'Due to cutbacks we've had to accept a sponsor for your stitches.'
'We're to spend more time engaging with patients on a more compassionate 'human' level...and here are the guidelines on how to do it!'
'I've been told to keep my spirits up.'
'Sure, we called for a second opinion. That was six months ago.'
'It's a postcard from your doctor. He says he'll be right with you.'
Thank you for suffering in silence.
'The NHS is committed to patients having control over their care...So if you'd like to check your symptoms online I'll be back later for a diagnosis and careplan.'
'According to the hospitals new electronic patients records system he's pregnant.'
'Dang, we lost another one...maybe this whole laughter thing is a crock.'
'But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring.'
'What happend? I thought you went to the dentist for a cleaning.'
To be more convincing when he faked a sick day, Bill liked to actually feel lousy.
'No, no, no...that's far too legible. Shakier. Much shakier!'
"You both appear to be in excellent health."
Tags:animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, cat, cats, feline, felines, cat owner, cat owners, cat lady, cat ladies, hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, examination, examinations, exam, exams, healthy, vet, vets, veterinarian, veterinarians, animal doctor, animal doctors, vet clinic, vet clinics, animal hospital, animal hospitals, veterinarian clinic, veterinarian clinics
"By the time we got him in here, he had already lost an awful lot of liquidity."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, liquidity, asset, assets, money, finances, personal finances, unhealthy, in danger, financial risk, financial problems, financial issues, money problems, money issues, liquid asset, liquid assets, economics, business, businessman, businessmen
"I yelled 'shazam' and there was lightning and a big explosion. They say I was unconcious for two hours."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's offices, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, superhero, superheros, hero, heros, superpower, superpowers, incompetent, incompetents, incompetence, shazam, lightning, unconscious, knocked out, explosion, explosions
'You have a lovely bedside manor.'
'In the event of the end of medicare, which country has an intact health care system?'
Woman looking at a sign in a pharmacy that says "Staff Picks"
Tags:pharmacy, pharmacies, chemist, chemists, chemist's, pharmacists, pharmacists, drugstore, drugstores, drug, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicine, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, over the counter, over-the-counter, prescribed, medical, staff, staff picks, staff favourites, staff favourites, recommendation, recommendations, suggestions, suggestions, drug abuse, medicine abuse, prescription abuse, pharmaceutical abuse, addiction, addict, addicts, healthcare, health care, insurance, health insurance
"It's dislocated, alright."