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'What was that...I didn't catch that what...What?'
'The specialist gave me this medicine for my hearing loss. He said two drops a day in my beer, but so far I haven't noticed any improvements.'
'I said... SPEAK UP!'
Hard of Hearing Institute.
'Captain are we going faster than sound?'
"I said, was it Manet or Monet who had syphilis?"
Tags:syphilis, stds, sexual transmitted disease, sexually transmitted diseases, monet, claude monet, oscar-claude monet, Édouard manet, art history, art historian, art historians, art gallery, art galleries, art exhibit, art exhibits, art exhibitions, faux pas, embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, hearing problem, hearing problems, deaf, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, oap, oaps, old age, pensioner, pensioners
'No, Miss Smith... I asked if you could roll your R's.'
Home for retired Jazzmen.
"His snoring is just loud enough to mask my tinnitus."
Tags:tinnitus, snore, snores, snoring, perfect match, perfect matches, true love, true loves, sleeping disorder, sleeping disorders, sleep disorder, sleep disorders, snorer, snorers, husband, husbands, wife, wives, hearing problem, hearing problems, hearing noises, old age, ageing, old married couple, old married couples, pensioner, pensioners, senior citizen, senior citizens
Guide dogs for the deaf
Tags:guide dogs, guide dogs, hearing-aid dog, hearing-aid dogs, helper animal, helper animals, helper dog, helper dogs, guide dog, hearing loss, hearing problem, hearing problems, blindness, blind, deaf, deafness, canine, seeing-eye dogs, puppies, puppy, megaphone, loudhailer, shouting, hollering, man's best friend, disabled, disability
'...time you had your ears syringed?'
'My tinnitus is so loud it keeps my wife awake.'
'I'm sorry, Lord, it's my ears, I thought you said Noah, build an arch!'
"What the hell do you want kelp for?"
Tags:dog, dogs, rescue, rescues, rescue dog, rescue dogs, dog owner, dog owners, rescuing, rescuer, rescuers, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, oap, oaps, old-age, old age, pensioner, pensioners, deaf, deafness, hearing loss, hearing problem, hearing problems, misheard, mishear, mishearing
'How's the new hearing aid?'
We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.
"The doctor thinks I need a hearing something or other."
"Mabel, this rabbit ear transplant is not working. I still can't hear that dang T.V.!"
"I didn't say you were hard of herring, I said hearing."
Tags:gardening jargon, gardening term, gardening terms, gardening terminology, green fingers, gardening tip, gardening tips, hearing aid, hearing horn, ear horn, ear trumpet, ear trumpets, hearing trumpet, hearing trumpets, ear horns, hearing horns, hearing problem, hearing problems, garden, gardens, gardener, gardeners, thelwell
'Ringing in your ears, you say?'
"I think you need a hearing test."
Tags:hearing test, heating tests, hearing exam, hearing exams, hearing problem, hearing problems, deaf, deafness, hearing loss, pensioner, pensioners, senior citizen, senior citizens, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, mishear, misheard, mishearing, listening, geriatrics, geriatric medicine, ent
As his hearing worsened, Larry had to buy louder and louder clothes.
Tags:fashions, fashion statement, fashion statements, fashion disaster, fashion disasters, dress sense, dress-sense, hearing problem, hearing problems, hearing loss, deaf, deafness, loud clothes, loud clothing, loud outfit, loud outfits, old age, old-age, ageing, pensioner, pensioners, senior citizen, senior citizens
'I though I'd developed tinnitus, then I remembered we still have a landline.'