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"Does your car have any idea why my car pulled it over?"
Tags:electric car, electric cars, self-driving car, self-driving cars, pulled over, highway patrol, modern times, autonomous, autonomy, vehicle, vehicles, smart, intelligent, intelligence, robot, robots, artificial intelligence, ai, police, police car, police cars, ticket, tickets, moving violation, moving violations, speeding ticket, speeding tickets
"Do I know how fast I was going? Isn't that your job?"
Tags:word play, play on words, irony, ironic, police, policeman, police man, police officer, officer, officers, road, roads, highway, highways, interstate, inter state, drive, driving, drives, driven, drove, speed, speeding, speeding ticket, ticket, tickets, pulled over, pull over, motorcycle cop, motorbike cop, cop, cops, sports car, sports cars, sportscar, deadpan, dead pan, sarcasm, sarcastic, bad idea, bad ideas, highway patrol, moving violation, moving violations
"Let me guess - your gas pedal stuck."
"I'd like to give you a break, but we did have you doing a hundred and eighty-six thousand miles a second on the radar."
Tags:police, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, state trooper, state troopers, traffic cop, traffic cops, highway patrol, pulling over, pulled over, traffic stop, traffic stops, speeding, crime, fine, fines, ticket, tickets, traffic violation, traffic violations, car, cars, vehicle, vehicles, automobile, automobiles, driving, driver, drivers, transportation, science, physics, speed of light, lightbulb, lightbulbs, light bulb, light bulbs, radar, space, time, speed, insurance, car insurance, dangerous driving, dangerous driver, dangerous drivers
"Do you know why we pulled you over today, sir?"
Tags:pulled over, pulling over, moving violation, moving violations, cop, cops, highway patrol, highway patrol officer, highway patrol officers, lion, lions, gnu, gnus, water buffalo, water buffaloes, savanna, savannas, watering hole, watering holes, hunt, hunts, hunting, hunter, hunters, predator, predators, prey, preying, water ox, ox, oxen
"Sir, have you been drinking, not drinking, drinking, not drinking, drinking?"
"Do you know how close to the sun you were flying?"
Tags:fly, flies, lying, icarus, myth, myths, mythology, mythologies, pull over, pulls over, highway patrol, cop, cops, traffic cop, traffic cops, police, police officer, police officers, officer, officers, traffic ticket, traffic tickets, moving violation, moving violations, human flight, regulation, regulations, safety, health and safety, human safety
Some mistakenly think 'HOV Lane' means Hot Occupant Vehicles.
'Technically it wasn't a red light I went through. It was more of a deep vermillion.'
"Where's the fire, pal?"
Tags:fire, fires, engine fire, engine fires, car fire, care fires, traffic stop, pulling over, irony, ironic, policeman, police officer, police officers, policemen, police men, police, highway patrol, highway patrolman, highway patrolmen, speed, speeder, speeders, speeding, pulled over, traffic ticket, traffic tickets
"You were doing 35.001 in a 35 mile zone..."
"I'll be needing all your pertinent information, miss."
Tags:payola, bribe, bribes, bribing, pull over, pulling over, cop, cops, police, police officer, police officers, highway patrol, highway patrolman, highway patrolmen, information, pertinent information, license and registration, licence, license, driver's licence, driver's license, measurement, measurements, hips, waist, bust, flirt, flirting, flirts
"Yeah, a merry Christmas to you too."
"I had you doing warp in a 65."
Tags:alien, space alien, alien craft, aliens, space aliens, spaceship, spaceships, flying saucers, ufos, speed limits, speeding ticket, speeding tickets, traffic cop, traffic cops, traffic police, transport cop, transport cops, transport police, flying saucer, space, ufo, speeding, speed limit, police, police officer, cop, highway patrol, speeder, speeders
"Oh-now I see where we part company. You are cleaving unto the spirit of the law, while I am cleaving to the letter of the law!"
"Sir, I'm gonna need you to step out of the car and place your thumbs on this text-alizer..."
Tags:texting and driving, distracted driving, law enforcement, driver safety, driving safety, driving safely, highway patrol, highway safety, smartphones, mobile devices, cops, police, traffic enforcement, text, texts, text message, text messages, drink driver, drink drivers, drunk driver, drunk drivers
"Well according to the breathalyzer you have been drinking - from the toilet."
'At 11:35 it's the SLOW sign. At 11:39, the STOP sign. At 11:43 it's back to the SLOW sign. At 11:49 you break for lunch. At 1:00 it's the STOP sign...'
"Sir, please pull the vehicle over first."
Tags:sobriety test, sobriety tests, pull over, pulls over, pulling over, pulled over, pulling over, highway patrol, police, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, jump the gun, jumps the gun, jumping the gun, overcompensate, overcompensates, overcompensating, drunk, drunks, drunkard, drunkards, drunken, sober, drunk driver, drunk drivers, drunk driving, drink driving, dui, duis, dwi, dwis, driving under the influence, driving while intoxicated, blackout, blackout drunk, blackout drunks, binge drinking, binge drinker, binge drinkers
Caution! Flagman training next 10 miles...stop, stop, stop...
"Ma'am, it's your husband. There's been an auto accident."
Oscar Jennings, unregistered nurse.
"60 may be the new 50 in the fantasy land you live in, but here in the real world, it's called exceeding the speed limit."
Tags:speed, speeds, speeding, speed limit, speed limits, speeding ticket, speeding tickets, moving violation, moving violations, traffic, traffic cop, traffic cops, highway patrol, highway patrolman, highway patrolmen, midlife, midlife crisis, sports car, sports cars, fantasy, car, fast car, traffic ticket, traffic stop, delusion, delusions, delusional, wishful thinking
"Wow. You DO own the road."