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Surgical Ward- Please Replace Divots
Tags:surgery, surgeries, surgeon, surgeons, operation, operations, operating room, operating rooms, surgical ward, surgical wards, operating theatre, operating theatre, operating theater, operating theaters, golf, golfer, golfers, golfing, divot, divots, golf divot, golf divots, hospital, hospitals, hippocratic oath, malpractice, medical malpractice
"I'm going to send you to someone who's not afraid of doing a little harm."
Tags:specialist, specialists, harm, harmful, office, offices, patient, patients, doctor, doctors, general practitioner, general practitioners, medical check up, medical check ups, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians, hippocratic oath, hippocratic oaths, malpractice, medical malpractice
Hippocrates Off The Record - "First, treat no lawyers."
Tags:hippocrates, hippocratic oath, oath, oaths, first do no harm, lawyer, lawyers, pariah, pariahs, social pariah, social pariahs, doctor, doctors, med school, medical school, medical schools, student, students, med student, med students, physician, physicians, outcast, outcasts, attorney, attorneys
"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."
Tags:back in business, monster, monsters, predator, predators, fang, fangs, wolf, wolves, big bad wolf, dentist, dentists, dental work, orthodontist, orthodontists, filling, fillings, hippocratic oath, dental surgery, dental surgeries, dental reconstruction, dental reconstructions, teeth whitening, vain, vanity, pearly whites
'Hippocrates wraps up his first press conference...'
"Yes Santa, you do qualify for a tummy tuck but I'm pretty sure that would violate my hippocratic oath somehow."
Tags:hippocratic oath, hippocratic oaths, santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, saint nick, saint nicholas, do no harm, santa's belly, bowl full of jelly, tummy tuck, tummy tucks, plastic surgery, plastic surgeries, plastic surgeon, plastic surgeons, christmas song, christmas songs, christmas carol, christmas carols, christmas, xmas, x-mas
"Why carry malpractice insurance if you don't malpractice once in a while?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, hospital, hospitals, malpractice, medical malpractice, insured, insurance, insurance policy, insurance policies, malpractice insurance, hippocratic oath, do no harm, rebel, rebels, irresponsible, irresponsibility
"First, do no harm. After that, go nuts."
Tags:hippocratic oath, the hippicratic oath, oath, oaths, malpractice, medical malpractice, go nuts, going nuts, go crazy, going crazy, going mad, promise, promises, doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, surgeon, surgeons, high pressure, high pressure job, high pressure jobs
Discovery of the Lost Page of the Hippocratic Oath: 'I pledge to keep my waiting room stocked with magazines that are months or even years out of date'.
"I was just wondering how our lives would have turned out if the Rhinocratic oath had caught on."
Bashar al-Assad, MD takes the Hippocratic oath...
"Good. Now start it up again."
Tags:doctor, doctors, md, mds, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, clinic, clinics, doctors clinic, doctors clinics, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, heart, hearts, heart problems, heart problem, heart failure, heart failures, no pulse, pulse, pulses, heartbeat, heart beat, stethoscope, stethoscopes, checkup, check-up, checkups, check-ups, medical exam, medical exams, medical examinations, medical examinations, walk in clinic, walk in clinics, incompetent, incompetence, malpractice, negligence, negligent, hippocratic oath, hippocratic oaths
"When did you say the other veterinary is back?"
'Group of doctors and surgeons peeking under a patient's sheet - all laughing at his private parts.'
"I have every right to tell you to lose weight. It says so right here in my hypocritical oath."
'I'm sorry, Mrs. Griswald... You've called me so often at my home that you now legally qualify as a friend and I can no longer treat you!"
'Well, that WAS an impressive string of obscenities, but I think I'll stick with the Hippocratic oath.'
Tags:doctor, patient, patients, hypodermic, needle, shot, needles, inoculations, injection, injections, bedside manner, oaths, swear word, swear words, bad language, bedside manner, shots, syringe, inoculation, pain, fear, curse, cursing, oath, swearing, hippocratic oath, medicine, medical, medicine, immunization
Uptight Medical Clinic: We treat the whole person, except sexual stuff.
'Young man, haven't you ever heard of the hippocratic oath?'
'How are you?'
A very conscientious doctor trying to resuscitate a dead door nail.
'Son, doctors take the Hippocratic oath and doctor office managers scream that one.'
'Young man, haven't you ever heard of the Hippocratic Oath?'
'Yes, but Hippocrates doesn't have Elma Yomp as a patient!'