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"You don't get water retention, dear. You get pizza retention."
'Son, it's time we told you. There are some people in this world who don't LIKE brussels sprouts...'
"I'm not the decaf you ordered, you will never find a job, and you are sitting on gum."
'You spend 90 hours a week on that computer so as your best friend, it's my responsibility to tell you to GET A LIFE!'
'Watching a lot of reality shows doesn't make you a realist!'
"Let me quote a few home truths to you."
"Just give me the truth, Doc...I can tell when you're trying to humor me."
'Richard: I want a divorce. And I never liked your stupid dog.'
"Well son, it all began when your Mother and I decided to visit the local 'SeaLife Centre'..."
"Let it breathe for an hour, to bring out the best home-truths."