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"I said I'm an astronomer, not an astrologist!"
Tags:astrologist, astrologists, astrology, astronomer, astronomers, astronomy, astrophysics, astrophysicist, astrophysicists, stargazer, stargazers, star-gazer, star-gazers, starsign, starsigns, star sign, star signs, pseudoscience, pseudosciences, pet peeve, pet peeves, hobby, job title, job titles, con, cons, scientist, scientists, psychic, psychics, fortune teller, fortune tellers, fortune, fortunes, horoscope, horoscopes
'Here's mine, water dominates, dress warm as you enter a chilly phrase...'
Tags:sea, seas, ocean, oceans, titanic, ship, ships, boat, boats, unsinkable, iceberg, icebergs, atlantic, shipwreck, shipwrecks, passanger, passangers, disaster, disasters, lifeboat, lifeboats, astrony, astronomer, astronomers, drowing, drown, drowns, drowned, horoscope, horoscopes, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"
Tags:bar, bars, pub, pubs, patron, patrons, customer, customers, drink, drinks, drinking, drinking alcohol, alcohol, alcoholic, liquor, booze, horoscope, horoscopes, zodiac, zodiac, astrology, star sign, star signs, western astrology, animal, animals, anthropomorphism, anthropomorphic, personification, bull, bulls, fish, ram, rams, crab, crabs, lion, lions, taurus, aeries, leo, pieces, cancer, relationship, relationships, dating, date, dates, pick-up line, pickup line, pickup lines, pick up line, pick up lines, compatibility
'With all due respect for your horoscope, your loan payment is still due today.'
"For what it's worth, next week all your stars and planets will be in good aspect for you to launch an invasion of England."
Tags:astrologer, astrologers, astrology, invade, invades, invading, invasion, invasions, norman, normans, horoscope, horoscopes, luck, good luck, war, wars, warring, warfare, predict, predicts, predicting, prediction, predictions, psychic, psychics, argue, argues, arguing, battle, battles, battling, fortune, fortunes, fortune teller, fortune tellers, fortune telling, start a war, starting a war, england, united kingdom
'I told you I refuse to be born today. I don't want to be Aries.'
"I was actually born in September, but I identify as a Pisces."
"All mine says is that I often give in to feelings of envy and that I should appreciate what I have. But your horoscope is better."
"These antidepressants should help with your natal Saturn-Pluto conjunction."
"29 degrees in Scorpio? What's that in Fahrenheit?"
"I don't need to check your chart! The best time for you to have surgery is right now!"
"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, when Jupiter is in his 6th house or Saturn is in his 2nd, until death do you part?"
"My client pleads not guilty on the grounds that Saturn was transiting his natal Pluto at the time of the incident."
"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."
'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'
'A lot of rubbish. We Leos aren't that easily fooled.'
'My horoscope says I'll be noticed by people who count.'
'Today's horoscope...Uranus is shining brightly and you'll have a chance encounter with a Leo...Huh!...what a load of mumbo jumbo'
'I'll be right with you. I'm reading my horoscope.'
'And now over to Mrs Miggins for our financial forecasts...'
Tags:financial forecasts, financial forecast, financial adviser, financial advisers, business consultant, business consultants, psychic, psychics, fortune teller, fortune tellers, fortune, fortunes, forecast, finance, financial, finances, stocks, shares, stock market, horoscope, crystal balls, crystal ball, magic, forecasting, financial forecasting, made up, who knows, guesswork, guessing, better than guesswork, superstitions, superstitious, mystical, mystics, better than nothing
'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'
'Your horoscope says 'a brilliant day for adventure and romance'.'
'With all due respect for your horoscope, Mr. Jones, the outlook for wheat this year is ... '
"According to my Zip Code, I prefer non-spicy foods, enjoy tennis more than golf, subscribe to at least one news-oriented periodical, own between thirty and thirty-five ties, never buy lemon-scented products, and have a power tool in my basement, but none
Tags:demographic, demographics, demographic analysis, psychographic, psychographics, zip code, zip codes, horoscope, horoscopes, guesswork, neighborhood, neighborhoods, neighbourhood, neighbourhoods, rich, income bracket, income brackets, expectation, expectations, false expectation, false expectations