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Mistaken Identity Theft
'I'm not saying your parents are lying to get you into this school, but your name isn't Susan, is it?'
Tags:rsa academies commission report, michael gove, secretary of education, admissions code, school admission, school admissions, admissions codes, equality, academies, free school, free schools, academy, catchment area, catchment areas, girls' school, girl's school, identity theft, identity thief, identity thieves
"For a limited time we'll let you buy back your stolen itendtity."
Tags:door-to-door salesman, door-to-door salesmen, door-to-door sales, door to door salesman, door to door salesmen, door to door sales, salesman, salesmen, sales, special offer, special offers, limited time offer, limited time offers, identity theft, identity thief, identity thieves, stolen identity, identity fraud, fraud, fraudster, fraudsters
'You're not bidding on something again, are you? . . . So when some goofy item and a debit in our account show up at roughly the same time, I am to assume what?'
"Madame Zelinski can provide an even more accurate. Reading with your date of birth and social security number,"
Tags:fortune-telling, fortunetelling, fortune, fortunes, fortune-teller, fortune-tellers, fortuneteller, fortunetellers, fortune teller, fortune tellers, psychic, psychics, future, prediction, predictions, predicting, client, clients, customer, customers, scrying, vision, visions, seeing the future, divination, seer, seers, occult, supernatural, computer, computers, technology, social insurance number, s.i.n., birthdate, date of birth, birth date, scam, scams, scammer, scammers, scamming, con artist, con artists, con, cons, fraud, identity theft, questionable, suspicious, sketchy, personal information, modern life
"Larry had his identity stolen, but they sent it right back."
"You didn't fill in the part that would make it incredibly easy to steal your identity."
'Please look them over very carefully, Mr. Lamson, and let us know if you see the man who stole your identity.'
"Okay. Plan B. We shave our moustaches, kill some hobos & steal their identities, then live off the fat of the land."
Tags:plan b, alternative plan, new plan, new plans, tax evasion, tax evader, tax evaders, tax fraud, fraud, fraudster, fraudsters, criminal, criminals, wanted criminal, wanted criminals, kill, murder, murderers, identity theft, fat of the land, live off the land, hide, hiding, escalate, escalation, escalating, escalated
'I'd like to report an identity theft.'
"I always thought white-collar crime was done by computer."
Tags:office, offices, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, executive, executives, white collar, white collar crime, white collar crimes, crimes, holdup, holdups, computer, computers, gang, gangs, stealing, stolen, stole, thief, thieves, identity theft, shake down, jump, jumped, law and order
'Since you stole my identity I thought I'd bring you the rest of the package.'
"Then I tried the move from business casual to white collar crime."
Tags:crimes, criminal, criminals, prison, prisons, jail, jails, prisoner, prisoners, inmate, inmates, cellmate, cellmates, locked up, locked away, white collar crime, white collar crimes, white collar criminal, white collar criminals, identity theft, ponzi scheme, ponzi schemes, embezzlement, fraud, racketeering, forgery, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen
"Don't kill it! That mosquito is carrying my DNA."
'Frank has been a victim of identity theft!'
"If you're my gramma you wouldn't have a problem consenting to a retina scan!"
Tags:little red riding hood, big bad wolf, wolf, wolves, grandmothers, grandchild, fairytale, fairytales, stolen identity, identity theft, disguise, disguised, stolen identities, retina scan, retina scans, retinal scan, retinal scans, security, identification, biometric, biometrics, biometric identification
"Look, Peg, you don't really have to dress like that for computer crime."
Tags:crimes, criminal, criminals, computer crime, computer crimes, internet, hacking, white collar crime, white collar crimes, white collar criminal, white collar criminals, nonviolent, fashion, fashionable, fashionista, fashions, style, styles, women, woman, clothes, clothing, embezzlement, fraud, bribery, identity theft, forgery
"I lined the pockets myself."
Tags:line your pockets, dishonest, money, lined pockets, men's clothing, white collar crime, white collar crimes, nonviolent crime, criminal, criminals, nonviolent criminal, men's fashion, financially motivated, suit, suits, business, businessman, businessmen, money laundering, identity theft, fraud, insider trading, money, money motivated, embezzlement, embezzling
'911..I'd like to report a crime...identity theft...I've become my mother!'
'Look closely. Do you see the one who stole your identity?'
'I've found that poverty helps protect my identity.'
'If you're concerned about privacy issues, put on some pants and close the windows.'
"My life had become a tangled web of fictitious user names and fiendishly clever passwords."
'How about we don't pay these bills and hope, in the meantime, someone steals our identity.'