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'It's done wonders for my self-esteem.'
Tags:fish, fishes, shark, sharks, fin, fins, self esteem, self-esteem, self confidence, self-confidence, pride, prides, proud, large, larger, size, sizes, sized, sizing, fake, fakes, faked, attach, attaches, attached, attachment, attachments, improve, improves, improvement, improved, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"After you confess, can you fill out this survey to help us improve our interrogation methods?"
Tags:police, police officer, officer, officers, law enforcement, crime, crimes, criminal, criminals, research, stereotypical, interrogate, interrogates, interrogation, interrogations, confess, confession, confessions, question, questions, questioning, subvert, subverted, subversion, survey, surveys, clash, whiplash, mood whiplash, mood swing, clashed, clashing, help, help us, help us improve, improved, improves, improvement, improvements, customer, customers, review, reviews, customer service, service, ironic, irony, ironically, modern life, modern world, criminal, criminals, crime, crimes, consumer, consumerism
"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"
Tags:improve, improvement, improvements, improved, better, interior design, interior decorating, home decor, decor, decoration, decorations, redecorating, decorating, renovation, renovations, renovated, changed, change, changes, changing, relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, changed man, newlywed, newlyweds, new wife, new wives, new house, new home, man, men
New, Improved Cat
Tags:cat lover, cat lovers, cat person, cat people, cat, cats, feline, felines, obedient, obedience, thoughtful, thoughtfulness, considerate, consideration, update, updates, updated, genetic engineer, genetic engineers, genetic engineering, genetic modification, genetically modified, improved, improvement, improvements
'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'
New Improved I.R.S.
Tags:politics, politician, politicians, political, political leader, political leaders, government, governments, irs, internal revenue service, treasury, department of treasury, tax, taxes, balloon, balloons, advertising, advertisement, advertise, advertisements, ad, ads, marketing, business, businesses, businessmen, businessman, businesswoman, businesswomen, new, improved, refurbished, renovated
'The ethics training has improved my behaviour to where I'm only amoral.'
"Nice, but as long as there are readers there will be scrolls."
Tags:book, books, scroll, scrolls, scrolling, technology, technologies, invention, invent, invents, internet, online, on-line, world wide web, history, historical, techno-pessimism, computer, computers, replace, replacing, obsolete, obsolescence, novel, novels, writer, writers, writing, replacement, improved, improving, improve
'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'Vocabulary'?'
'I just came from our stock broker. Our quality of life has just improved!'
"This is Heaven, you idiot. Everything's perfect. There is no suggestion box."
'I was once a caterpillar like you, then I started to listen to personal improvement tapes and viola, look at me now!'
'Now this is my kind of green!'
'I need you to identify the problem. Here's your mirror.'
A new chair for the 21st century, punctuated by a few ventilation apertures for that stylish new direction in mass seating.
"The cutting edge doesn't last forever."
Tags:the cutting edge, cutting edge technology, cutting edge technologies, cutting edge, new, improved, technology, technologies, innovation, innovations, advance, advancement, advancements, cutting-edge, pessimist, pessimists, pessimistic, debby downer, debbie downer, negative nancy, negative, stubborn, stubbornness, old, old age, ageing, aging
'Our fare hike will leave service at the same level, just like guess what?'
"Before you go, would you mind taking a few moments to fill out a short form rating your relationship experience?"
Tags:break up, break ups, break-up, breaking up, break-ups, wife, wives, marriage, married, married life, subvert, subverted, subversion, survey, surveys, clash, whiplash, mood whiplash, mood swing, clashed, clashing, help, help us, help us improve, improved, improves, improvement, improvements, customer, customers, review, reviews, customer service, service, ironic, irony, ironically, modern life, modern world, satisfaction, satisfied, divorce, divorces, divorced, split, splitting up, split-up, leaving, leaving you
"The thing is, you have to really want to change."
Tags:pupate, pupa, cocoon, caterpillar, butterfly, butterflies, caterpillars, changing, improving, changes, improves, improve, change, self improvement, improved, chrysalis, cliche, advice, advise, adviser, experience, experienced, cliches, cliched, self improved, mentor, mentoring, business, success, helping, help, businesses, successes, successful, redundant, useless
"Don't we have anything new and improved for dinner?"
"At least my putting has improved."
Tags:golf, desert island, deserted island, golfer, golfers, golfing, putt, putting, putts, putter, stroke, time, bored, improve, practice, practise, swing, improvement, improved, golf course, club, clubs, player, players, train, trains, training, game, silver lining, positive, attitude, shot, shots, eternity, concentrate, score, castaway, sport, optimistic, shipwrecked, alone, effort, stranded, obsession, stuck, improved, improvement, goal, marooned, deserted, lost, hobby, hobbies
'Try not to stare. Father Time hot hair plugs and botox.'
Tags:hair plug, hair plugs, cosmetic, cosmetics, cosmetic surgery, cosmetic surgeries, plastic surgery, plastic surgeries, stare, stares, staring, stared, appearance, appearances, conscious, consciousness, improve, improves, improved, improving, improvement, improvements, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
'I rigged up the copier, so we shouldn't have to restock it with paper until sometime in 2011!'
By making bogus voodoo dolls of her more unruly students...
Miracles of modern sports medicine: the Nerdectomy.
Tags:run, runs, running, runner, runners, ran, improve, improves, improving, improvement, improvements, improved, compare, compares, compared, comparison, comparisons, nerdectomy, nerdectomies, sports medicine, sports medicines, miracle, miracles, miraculous, fast, faster, quick, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers